nancyschmancy

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nancyschmancy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 409
  • Number of comments : 131
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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nancyschmancy's page activity

Visits<b>KyoshiroT</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 3:57am<b>GameHorse</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 2:53am<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 5:02pm<b>BrainEaters</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 1:52am<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 7:02am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 11:30am<b>mimi_tenten</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 7:20pm<b>abattior</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 9:05pm<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:29am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 9:49am<b>swick25</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 6:54pm<b>bummervacation</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 1:52am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 11:51pm<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 12:58pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 6:40pm<b>jillytc</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 9:15pm<b>kparra7</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 12:23pm<b>il0v3w33d</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 8:17am

nancyschmancy's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of nancyschmancy's badges

nancyschmancy's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML

by Andrew / 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML

by Bratty son / 10/23/2012 at 12:25am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2012 at 6:27pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Kids

Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML

by stoych / 10/08/2012 at 3:14am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I discovered that my 12-year-old son has secretly been printing out and selling copies of the suggestive photos from my camera that I'd taken for my husband. He's been selling them to kids at school for a dollar each. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 7:02pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I have a massive headache, thanks to my asshat of a roommate, who decided to balance our tea kettle on the top of the kitchen door. When I stumbled into the kitchen, half-awake, it came smashing down onto my head. FML

by sharky / 10/05/2012 at 4:25pm / United States / Health

Today, my husband spent our entire anniversary sulking because I wasn't up for sex. I gave birth to our first child less than two weeks ago. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2012 at 12:25am / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend told me what turns her on: cheese. FML

by / 09/26/2012 at 10:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I moved into my new apartment. I was feeling really excited until my new neighbor knocked on my door and left me what looks like rabbit ears on my welcome mat. He just stared at me expectantly as though I should be thankful. FML

by Nickie809 / 09/17/2012 at 10:59am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out there's a rumor going around that my smoking hot co-worker and I had sex over the weekend. I'm not nearly as pissed off about the rumor as I am by the fact that I can't remember it because I was too drunk. FML

by bruisedego31 / 09/12/2012 at 5:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I came home from work to be given $1 by my mother. This normally would have been nice, had my mother not said, "I just sold that ugly old black and white picture frame you always leave lying around in your room." Which also would have been nice if that "frame" wasn't my Kindle. FML

by humorizer / 09/12/2012 at 4:44am / United States (Texas) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that the car I got a great deal on a few days ago, needs a new transmission. I'm now the proud owner of a very large and very expensive paperweight. FML

by BuspassBob / 09/10/2012 at 12:48pm / United States / Money

Today, my boyfriend confided to me that he has a used condom collection. When I reacted with disgust, he "reassured" me that he only keeps the ones he uses with me. FML

by WTF / 08/22/2012 at 6:22pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, out of curiosity, I measured the length of my penis whilst in the shower. A couple of hours later, my father called me downstairs to show me something. Turns out I left the ruler on top of the shower tree. He won't stop laughing. FML

by Infiltrator4444 / 07/25/2012 at 9:11pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, out of curiosity, I measured the length of my penis whilst in the shower. A couple of hours later, my father called me downstairs to show me something. Turns out I left the ruler on top of the shower tree. He won't stop laughing. FML

by Infiltrator4444 / 07/25/2012 at 9:11pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy