nancyschmancy

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nancyschmancy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 355
  • Number of comments : 131
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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nancyschmancy's page activity

Visits<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 5:02pm<b>BrainEaters</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 1:52am<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 7:02am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 11:30am<b>mimi_tenten</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 7:20pm<b>abattior</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 9:05pm<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:29am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 9:49am<b>swick25</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 6:54pm<b>bummervacation</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 1:52am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 11:51pm<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 12:58pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 6:40pm<b>jillytc</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 9:15pm<b>kparra7</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 12:23pm<b>il0v3w33d</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 8:17am<b>AnxietySlave</b> - the 11/27/2012 at 6:10pm<b>ptoui</b> - the 10/15/2012 at 7:32am

nancyschmancy's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of nancyschmancy's badges

nancyschmancy's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

by poopsthegame / 12/03/2012 at 2:36am / United States (Hawaii) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML

by Blake Lawrence / 11/26/2012 at 1:59pm / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, in a state of extreme boredom, I decided to dress my 6-month-old son in girl's clothes. As he sat in my lap in a frilly dress, and as I was placing a very pink and lacy bow on his head, my mother-in-law unexpectedly walked in. She now thinks I'm mentally unstable and should be in therapy. FML

by ekm86 / 11/26/2012 at 11:52am / United States (Oregon) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML

by Tymer / 11/23/2012 at 10:56am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to motivate my 9-year-old sister to clean her room. She said she'd only agree if she could kill me. Thinking she was just kidding around, and not a total psychopath, I said sure. She ran to her room shouting, "Yes! I'm gonna use the big knife!" She's still cleaning now. FML

by anon / 11/21/2012 at 2:34pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, someone posted photos from a party I was at. On each photo I'm posing in with a girl, my hand is not touching her, but is hovering over her like some creepy weirdo loser. My Facebook nickname is now of course "Hover Hand." FML

by Hover Hand / 11/20/2012 at 9:37pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm in the hospital and it's been 44 hours since I've eaten anything. My doctors won't let me eat and my parents are sitting across the room, eating. FML

by RayneSong / 11/20/2012 at 6:25pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm now about 15 pounds overweight. When I called him a hypocrite as he's over 40 pounds overweight, he said that his weight didn't matter because "it's the girl's job to look hot." FML

by thinner than you / 11/20/2012 at 4:57pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, I discovered that no matter how hot and exhausted you are, being blasted in the face with a high pressure hose is always more painful than refreshing. FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2012 at 2:32am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a year of living with my boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom. FML

by Anonimo / 11/08/2012 at 4:22pm / Italy (Sardegna) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

by poorkids / 10/31/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, she asked me to whisper her name. Apparently, her name is not Kate. FML

by you / 10/30/2012 at 3:46pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML

by Anonymous / 10/26/2012 at 5:59pm / Switzerland (Zurich) / Love

Today, my friend and I were walking home when we saw a patch of wet cement. Taking a page out of every single Disney movie ever made, we wrote our names in it. What Disney movies don't show is when the neighbors tattle on you and you have to pay $500 to get the cement redone. FML

by onlyme / 10/24/2012 at 10:36pm / United States / Money