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nammz

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nammz
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  • Number of visits : 40715
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Today, I texted the man I'm dating, told him I was having a terrible day and asked him to say something to cheer me up. His response? "Did you know that rabbits shriek when they're killed?" I'm still having a terrible day, and now I can't stop thinking about dying, shrieking bunnies. FML

#4188521
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36819) - you deserved it (997)

On 07/31/2009 at 6:46pm - love - by deadbunnies (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to take off my girlfriend's bra. When I finally unhooked it, it snapped back and hit me in the eye. FML

#2890186
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39408) - you deserved it (18838)

On 06/14/2009 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by HatedbyBras (man) - Netherlands

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (113196) - you deserved it (6686)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

#2796637
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68916) - you deserved it (16883)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for awhile, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
850 comments

I agree, your life sucks (275631) - you deserved it (23242)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - intimacy - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

#761206
482 comments

I agree, your life sucks (198946) - you deserved it (58770)

On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938
1625 comments

I agree, your life sucks (460116) - you deserved it (571709)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)



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