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naasatisfn's FML badges
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naasatisfn's favorite FMLs
Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML
by lilben / 06/10/2011 at 4:09am / United States (California) / Work
Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML
by Anonymous / 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Seriously / 05/24/2011 at 1:46pm / United States / Work
Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML
by ninalian / 05/22/2011 at 2:30am / United States (Puerto Rico) / Health
Today, I went out with my best friend and her hot brother. Upon our exit out of the restaurant I walked right into the glass door and rebounded back off it. The whole restaurant was silent as I shamefully walked out only to trip on the curb outside. FML
by Anonymous / 05/21/2011 at 10:18am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by no one / 05/21/2011 at 5:07am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy
Today, at my hairdressing job, my first client of the day came in for a cut. Her hair smelled awful, and when I asked her why, she informed me that she'd gotten trashed with some friends the night before, and one of them had puked in her hair. She came to me to get it cleaned out. FML
by ewwgross / 05/20/2011 at 7:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work
by gnownayrgnow / 05/08/2011 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I saw a car swerving in front of me on the freeway, so I whipped out my cell to report the DUI. As soon as it started ringing, I see police lights in my rear view and got slapped with a ticket for using a cell phone while driving. After explaining why, the officer said, "Nice try." FML
by AE86Turbo / 05/03/2011 at 1:22am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, my boyfriend called me as I was getting ready for bed and asked me to pick him up from the bar. Being a loving girlfriend I drive the 45 minutes; when I get there his friend informs me he left about 45 minutes ago. FML
by Anonymous / 05/01/2011 at 1:36am / Reserved / Love
by spartanson / 04/28/2011 at 6:28am / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that our neighbors told almost everyone on our street that I was mentally handicapped. All this time I wasn't sure why they would speak slowly and loudly at me. Now they won't believe me when I tell them I'm a 4.0 GPA student. FML
by Imslow / 04/05/2011 at 12:40pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous