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n_epic_fail

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2269
  • Number of comments : 446
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About n_epic_fail : Did I offend you?
I don't care.

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n_epic_fail's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was running from the cops I jumped behind a bush to hide. Turns out it was a massive thorn bush. I later had the most painful shower I have ever experienced. FML

#18431842
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7889) - you deserved it (65443)

On 12/04/2011 at 10:22pm - misc - by Jess - United States (California)

Today, as I was running from the cops I jumped behind a bush to hide. Turns out it was a massive thorn bush. I later had the most painful shower I have ever experienced. FML

#18431842
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7889) - you deserved it (65443)

On 12/04/2011 at 10:22pm - misc - by Jess - United States (California)

Today, while I was watching TV, my boyfriend took my unicorn pillow pet and made it hump my arm. I told him to stop acting like a child. He replied, "Children don't have sex like this," and started making sex noises while making the pillow pet hump my arm faster and harder. FML

#18425856
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28517) - you deserved it (9982)

On 12/04/2011 at 8:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

#18417408
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32770) - you deserved it (5341)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after telling my boyfriend I was willing to try just about anything to revive our sex life, he confessed to having a swirly fetish. FML

#18414681
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22964) - you deserved it (4217)

On 12/02/2011 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by Jess49 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I gave my boyfriend the silent treatment. He put his Facebook status as "When your girlfriend finally shuts up for once". FML

#18287242
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15945) - you deserved it (41317)

On 11/19/2011 at 6:42am - love - by kaybax - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

#18239656
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15035) - you deserved it (52529)

On 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by shootme - Canada

Today, it was laundry day. After my fifth and final load, I noticed I never added any laundry detergent. FML

#18239107
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18201) - you deserved it (20027)

On 11/13/2011 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, the guy I've recently started seeing confided that he's relieved I'm on the heavier side, and that he has a thing for watching chubby women eat. I just reached my ideal weight after losing 40 pounds. FML

#18238622
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32641) - you deserved it (3529)

On 11/13/2011 at 3:50pm - love - by notfatanymore (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I brought my girlfriend of six months over to meet my family. When my grandpa saw her, he said, "What a waste of good breeding stock." FML

#18236963
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23178) - you deserved it (2140)

On 11/13/2011 at 12:10pm - love - by mandie - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML

#18235563
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24193) - you deserved it (5723)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:46am - love - by notthatkinkyanyway - China (Beijing)

Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML

#18234990
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27541) - you deserved it (2076)

On 11/13/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML

#18234990
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27541) - you deserved it (2076)

On 11/13/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter asked me how to spell "Orange". "O-R-A-N-G-E" I replied. Without missing a beat, she says "No, I mean the colour, not the fruit." She is 16. FML

#18234448
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40380) - you deserved it (7060)

On 11/13/2011 at 1:53am - kids - by weswithaute - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I have done enough trials to confirm that I puke after each time I have sex. FML

#18233744
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40606) - you deserved it (3967)

On 11/13/2011 at 12:19am - intimacy - by unlucky - United States



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