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myroxy240

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myroxy240

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 12 June 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 287
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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myroxy240's favorite FMLs

yesterday mah boyfriend gave me a hickey on mah breast. To be fair I decided to give him a hickey on his chest. He was so worried about catching shit from the guys on his swim team that he dislocated mah jaw trying to get me off him. FML

Today, the guy I was sexting askd me to stop including my face in the pictures. FML

#21050596
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49404) - you deserved it (20109)

On 02/04/2014 at 7:41pm - intimacy - by khfhjfsb (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I dreamed that Robert Downey Jr. kept flrting with me and asking me out. Each time, I refused him, cuz I'm taken. When I proudly told mah boyfriend, he said, ( What the hell? I could've kissed the mouth that kissed the Iron Man! ) FML

#21049393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41185) - you deserved it (8355)

On 02/03/2014 at 3:11pm - love - by Can't Believe It. - United States (Pennsylvania)

as usual, I stress ate!! After having mah exams prolongd for an extra week, I ate three extremely large packs of Skittles, an then threw them all up!! Taste the rainbow, puke the rainbow!! FML

#21048665
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38329) - you deserved it (14270)

On 02/02/2014 at 10:26pm - health - by Sad Student - Canada (Ontario)

Yesterday... mah dogs freakd out and startd getting violent because they thought the sound of mah vibrator was the other's growling. FML

#21048300
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42551) - you deserved it (10777)

On 02/02/2014 at 4:50pm - animals - by foops (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with mah 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk!! When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me an screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into mah balls!! FML

#21044971
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49960) - you deserved it (6256)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Taday I moved back into ma dorm . My ex-girlfriend.. . and te guy se left me for.. . now coabit next door . Now I get to ear tem screwing wile I try to do ma omework . FML

#21043113
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50362) - you deserved it (4036)

On 01/28/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by Order of the Dangling Testicles (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a black eyeile trying to break up a figt caused by some complete bastard making a "yo momma" joke at te funeral of ma best friend's moter. FML

#21042087
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53469) - you deserved it (4473)

On 01/27/2014 at 6:09pm - health - by knobbed (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today , I Shut One Of My Breasts In My Car Door. FML

#21031414
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49514) - you deserved it (9321)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

TODAY, MAH 7-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER MADE A NEW GAME: HITTING ME IN THE GROIN WHEN I'M NOT EXPECTING IT !! SHE HUNTS ME IN THE HOUSE, HIDES AROUND CORNERS, AND BEHIND FURNITURE TO AMBUSH ME !! SHE'LL EVEN DO IT IF SHE CATCHE ME NAPPING !! I'M A GROWN MAN LIVING IN FEAR OF A LITTLE GIRL !! MEGA FML

#21029770
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52980) - you deserved it (11919)

On 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today , mah younger brother askd if he could watch me puttd a tampon in. He's 17. FML

#21029617
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65863) - you deserved it (6242)

On 01/16/2014 at 8:37am - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - Vietnam (Ha Noi)

Today as if having to endure the noises of my parents having sex in the next room wasn't painful enough my mom decided to shout ( Yeah! Like a horse! ) I want to cry. FML

#21028949
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58632) - you deserved it (5204)

On 01/15/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by DisturbedMan (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today... I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming... peieng all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. mega FML

#21026318
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21841) - you deserved it (48689)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, mah husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in mah screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, ( Where's the monster? ) FML

#21025946
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53698) - you deserved it (32539)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I usad tha rastroom at a mall. I thought I was alona, so I startad singing. Whan I got out of tha stall, thara wara man staring at ma. Not only did I ambarrass mysalf with my own singing, I'd accidantally usad tha man's rastroom too. FML

#21024837
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42437) - you deserved it (21043)

On 01/11/2014 at 7:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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