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myoukei

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myoukei

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7977
  • Number of comments : 154
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About myoukei : I'm a dreamer, writer, and an armature artist. I like rpgs (especially elder scrolls), making videogame-theamed jewelry, and working on my novel.

I use the app, so i will probably be late to reply to comments.

Sorry for any spelling errors in my comments!!!

myoukei's page activity

Visits<b>anarchiax</b> - 24 hours ago<b>Manosapo</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:46pm<b>DrSkillz</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 2:32pm<b>NOTaDISTRACTION</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:40am<b>levention</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:57am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:57am<b>lakota201</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:34am<b>Ninjawalker115</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:41pm<b>xpheonix57</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:10am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 10:39pm<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 12:37pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 10:44am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:47am<b>edvin</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 4:54am<b>mathen</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 1:50am<b>kaykay9611</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 1:37am<b>stargazer091</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 12:24am<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 11:58pm

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myoukei's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my cousin's wedding. The groom walked over when the two of us were talking, took one good look at me, slapped me on the ass, and said, "You know, if I wasn't marrying Rose here, you'd be next." Yeah, about that: I'm a 16-year old guy. FML

#20485957
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35816) - you deserved it (4086)

On 01/30/2013 at 7:21am - love - by Denki (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, I learned it's a bad idea to text and smoke while drunk, because there is an increased risk of throwing your phone off the balcony and sticking your cigarette into your pocket. FML

#20485916
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11545) - you deserved it (53800)

On 01/30/2013 at 5:13am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 5-year-old nephew had the most amazing idea: to play a game with my keys. He took out all ten keys individually and hid them around the house. So far it's been two hours and I haven't found a single one. FML

#20485810
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30607) - you deserved it (3592)

On 01/30/2013 at 2:03am - kids - by idislikeblanks (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mother "checked in" to rehab on Facebook. The same rehab that told her to hand over her smartphone. The dumbass was smart enough to steal my phone and dumb enough to get it confiscated. FML

#20485491
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25538) - you deserved it (2397)

On 01/29/2013 at 10:18pm - health - by motherless - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML

#20484695
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24619) - you deserved it (9165)

On 01/29/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I saw a lady who had fainted. I ran over to help, only to find out that she was unstable and had a knife in her hand. She was pointing it at me, and growled threateningly every time I tried to move away. It took the cops an hour to defuse the situation. FML

#20484368
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33551) - you deserved it (2399)

On 01/29/2013 at 4:48am - misc - by thegirlofthedad (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone sex with me. When I explained to him that I wasn't my sister and that we just sound the same on the phone, he replied, "Don't care, let's keep going." FML

#20484366
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44805) - you deserved it (4454)

On 01/29/2013 at 4:40am - intimacy - by Awkward... (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I learned that I look amazing in a little black dress. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife. FML

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45451) - you deserved it (5932) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36836) - you deserved it (2410)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

#20481657
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39004) - you deserved it (7866)

On 01/27/2013 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was on a ladder at work, fetching some stock from one of the storage shelves. Some teenage kid thought it would be fucking hilarious to grab the ladder and violently shake it. He hadn't bet on me being startled enough to fall off and fracture my elbow on the floor. FML

#20481589
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32673) - you deserved it (2094)

On 01/27/2013 at 4:59pm - health - by fucking teen cunts (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to slowly explain to my son that an "analogy" is a literary device, not a genre of porn. FML

#20481338
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26366) - you deserved it (2956)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML

#20479916
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31838) - you deserved it (3555)

On 01/26/2013 at 3:44pm - work - by FUCK THE PIGS (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend about my upcoming mouth surgery. He freaked out. Not because he's worried about me, but because I told him I will not be able to give him head for two weeks. FML



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