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myoukei

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myoukei
  • Town/Country : New York
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3658
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 29 posted

About myoukei : I'm a dreamer, writer, and an armature artist. I like rpgs (especially elder scrolls), making videogame-theamed jewelry, and working on my novel.

I use the app, so i will probably be late to reply to comments.

Sorry for any spelling errors in my comments!!!

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myoukei's favorite FMLs

Today, after waking up, I walk into the kitchen to see my two-year-old with a blue sharpie in hand as he says, "Look mom, color!" He left no appliance or cabinet untouched in his coloring masterpiece, and I'm still trying to figure out where he got the sharpie from. FML

Today, a woman attempted to pickpocket me while trying to educate me about God. FML

Today, my fiancé and I told my future mother-in-law that we are expecting. Her response was, "Why are you doing this to me?" FML

#21078559
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37517) - you deserved it (3771)

On 03/05/2014 at 5:15am - misc - by dyingangel246 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom came into my room, yelling at me about a pregnancy test that she found in my bathroom. My mom wouldn't believe me when I said it wasn't mine. Turns out my sister bought the test, threw it under my bathroom cabinet, and now she won't admit to the prank. She thinks this is hilarious. FML

#21078463
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40901) - you deserved it (2834)

On 03/05/2014 at 12:43am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML

#21077955
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39585) - you deserved it (2531)

On 03/04/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by fuck you, jack (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my sister told me about a website that explained why our stressed cat has been obsessively pulling out the fur on her legs. Interested, I asked for a link. Not just out of deep concern for the cat, but because I have the same problem. FML

#21077438
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30456) - you deserved it (4694)

On 03/03/2014 at 11:40pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my students presented their projects on genetics to the rest of the class. One student told the class that salted and unsalted peanuts were an example of genetic variation. She was serious. FML

#21076929
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39918) - you deserved it (3962)

On 03/03/2014 at 2:58pm - work - by Biologyfacepalm (woman) - United States

Today, I decided it was time to tell my daughter that she had been adopted. Not only had she known for 5 years, she found out from my drunk sister. FML

#21076752
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40965) - you deserved it (7012)

On 03/03/2014 at 10:55am - kids - by adopted (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I told my parents about the amazing guy I met. My mom immediately stormed out. My dad got up, looked at me and told me he's disappointed in me for "falling into the traps of the Internet," and leaves. I didn't meet him on the Internet. FML

#21073930
93 comments

Today, my car was found with a smashed window and a torn-apart steering column, in order to hot-wire it. The thief didn't get away with my car, though. The engine was in the garage, where I've been working on it for two days. FML

Today, my daughter asked me the difference between "their" and "they're". This is the same child I've been spending thousands of dollars on to send to law school. FML

#21072333
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39075) - you deserved it (5327)

On 02/26/2014 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML

#21070396
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42487) - you deserved it (3769)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by fuckmeitsgettingworse - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, a guy from work that I barely know gave me sunflowers for my birthday. He told me, "You mentioned they were your favorite." I mentioned it to my family at home a few days ago. FML

#21069947
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42662) - you deserved it (3482)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by You Are My Sunshine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking a dog at the animal hospital where I work when it pooped out a rag-like object. I told the doctor, who told me to clean it off to see what it was. It was a rainbow-colored thong. We have to give it back to the owner when they pick their dog up. FML

#21069925
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33852) - you deserved it (2446)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:01pm - animals - by crap - United States (Nevada)

Today, I've been forced to start packing to go on a vacation with my parents, because they say I've been studying too hard and need a break. I've hardly studied at all and was planning on making up for it all in the time I had left before finals. I'm screwed. FML

#21069416
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19757) - you deserved it (35463)

On 02/23/2014 at 2:00pm - misc - by goodbye cruel world (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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