Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

myoukei

Offline (yesterday at 8:31pm) | Search for a member

myoukei

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7926
  • Number of comments : 153
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About myoukei : I'm a dreamer, writer, and an armature artist. I like rpgs (especially elder scrolls), making videogame-theamed jewelry, and working on my novel.

I use the app, so i will probably be late to reply to comments.

Sorry for any spelling errors in my comments!!!

myoukei's page activity

Visits<b>anarchiax</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Manosapo</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:46pm<b>DrSkillz</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 2:32pm<b>NOTaDISTRACTION</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:40am<b>levention</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:57am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:57am<b>lakota201</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:34am<b>Ninjawalker115</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:41pm<b>xpheonix57</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:10am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 10:39pm<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 12:37pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 10:44am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:47am<b>edvin</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 4:54am<b>mathen</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 1:50am<b>kaykay9611</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 1:37am<b>stargazer091</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 12:24am<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 11:58pm

myoukei's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of myoukei's badges

myoukei's favorite FMLs

Today, I did a bike ride and run with a gent I'm serious about. On the run, I had a big lead until he passed me up saying, "I'm going to marry you." Puzzled that he would propose and then sprint away leaving me trailing, he clarified at the finish. His words: "I'm going to bury you." FML

#21014028
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37337) - you deserved it (4784)

On 01/02/2014 at 8:17am - love - by Babs - United States (California)

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. My wife got pissed when I didn't immediately check on her, but rather the other driver. That other driver was my daughter. FML

#21012945
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54249) - you deserved it (4842)

On 01/01/2014 at 1:21pm - love - by Crashed - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend found an old nude of me on his best friend's PS3. I had no idea this guy existed until we moved in with him. FML

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

#21010264
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44993) - you deserved it (23403)

On 12/30/2013 at 7:10am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

#21009908
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38441) - you deserved it (3044)

On 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by LeaveHimAlone (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

#21009159
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49061) - you deserved it (25541)

On 12/29/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by Jizzyface (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

#21008990
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25902) - you deserved it (53277)

On 12/29/2013 at 2:01am - kids - by ConfusedDad - United States

Today, I got a whistle key finder from my grandma for Christmas. This would have been nice if I could actually whistle. FML

#21005460
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28648) - you deserved it (4433)

On 12/25/2013 at 9:07pm - misc - by princesss_14 - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a pair of earrings, a necklace, and some rings as a Christmas gift from my grandma. This would have been nice if I weren't a guy. This is her way of mocking me for wearing what she calls "girl colors", such as white. FML

#21004875
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37882) - you deserved it (2987)

On 12/25/2013 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got my period, and had to rush to my parents' bathroom for some pads. They'd put all our wrapped presents in their bathroom. As I was looking, my dad thought I was opening presents and barged in, only to see me with my pants around my ankles. Now he won't stop laughing. FML

#21003547
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39916) - you deserved it (3573)

On 12/24/2013 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

#21003362
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38358) - you deserved it (5272)

On 12/24/2013 at 5:45am - misc - by yarenis - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked my lazy daughter to go make her bed. She responded by lighting our garbage bin on fire. FML

#21001381
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39283) - you deserved it (9312)

On 12/22/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a sign he made in front of my Minecraft house. FML

#21000308
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44147) - you deserved it (5838)

On 12/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by back to creepers (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, my mum and I were referred to as "ladies". I'm happy for her, since she always complains about looking masculine. However, I would still like to be called a gentleman, seeing as how I am one. FML

#21000124
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40082) - you deserved it (3219)

On 12/21/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by FML (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I came home after working on a difficult case. My husband wasn't home so I hopped into bed. My feet felt something and I reached down and picked it up out of the sheets. It was lacy black thongs. I don't own black thongs. FML

#20999870
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51026) - you deserved it (3330)

On 12/21/2013 at 2:08am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: