Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

myoukei

Offline (the 12/16/2014 at 4:55am) | Search for a member

myoukei

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10464
  • Number of comments : 157
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 33 posted

About myoukei : I'm a dreamer, writer, and an armature artist. I like rpgs (especially elder scrolls), making videogame-theamed jewelry, and working on my novel.

I use the app, so i will probably be late to reply to comments.

Sorry for any spelling errors in my comments!!!

myoukei's page activity

Visits<b>Demonface54</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:02am<b>sweetnsourrr</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 1:25am<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:20am<b>grunt2423</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:41pm<b>epic174</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:07pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 6:03pm<b>joyboy390</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 1:45pm<b>Burberryhype</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:25pm<b>lonelybirthday</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:58am<b>CaptainColor</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:46am<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:47am<b>3051628</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:37am<b>RollingCakes</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:25am<b>Kazze</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:02am<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:00am<b>15Erik</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 3:21am<b>DrSkillz</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 12:39am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 11:21am

myoukei's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of myoukei's badges

myoukei's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out the real reason my boyfriend kept starting fights with me, and why my best friend kept telling me to break up with him. It was so they could turn their affair into a proper relationship, then twist it around to make me look like a bitch for dumping him. FML

#21058247
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60498) - you deserved it (4476)

On 02/12/2014 at 4:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my in-laws kept mocking me for being "too clean" because I take a shower every day. They think I'm weird and kept saying things like "Be careful when you hug your daughter, she might squeak!" and calling me names like "water-wasting bitch." They haven't stopped all day. FML

#21058081
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45712) - you deserved it (3949)

On 02/12/2014 at 12:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML

#21057323
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45997) - you deserved it (6018)

On 02/11/2014 at 4:50pm - love - by not even getting any of her shrimp (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my mom made a Facebook status about me: "My daughter is on her rags and won't shut the fuck up #annoyingbitch". FML

#21057121
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47602) - you deserved it (8056)

On 02/11/2014 at 11:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at work, a customer asked me to unlock the restroom for them. I honestly couldn't figure out which gender they were, but I didn't want to be rude and ask, so I took a chance. I unlocked the wrong one. FML

#21056381
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43943) - you deserved it (5215)

On 02/10/2014 at 3:48pm - work - by elizabethkalyn (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after my car being in the shop for over a day and with no updates from the dealership, I decided to pay them a visit. The place was almost empty, and they hadn't done any work on my car. But judging by the used condom on my back seat, somebody got their own oil checked. FML

#21053684
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43976) - you deserved it (3826)

On 02/07/2014 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to ask the guy I like if he'll be my Valentine. I wrote the question on a piece of paper and passed it to him, trying to be cute. He read it, wrote his answer with a smile, and passed it back. It said, "Depends, do you swallow?" No, no I don't. FML

#21053668
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44098) - you deserved it (9464)

On 02/07/2014 at 7:18pm - love - by mariana (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

#21053382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40432) - you deserved it (3273)

On 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mayotte

Today, like every day, I had to walk to my bus stop. The only difference today is there was snow and ice over everything. Not only did I slip and fall, soaking both myself and the contents of my bag, the bus driver saw me there at the bus stop and drove straight past. FML

#21051124
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43308) - you deserved it (3663)

On 02/05/2014 at 9:07am - misc - by no snow day (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

#21050005
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40824) - you deserved it (4371)

On 02/04/2014 at 1:16am - misc - by Lithiac - United States (Florida)

Today, after years of insomnia and going to doctors to help get a regular sleeping pattern, I finally fell asleep without the help of medication, only to dream about being chased by an angry seal and singing to Rihanna with a horse. This is probably why I don't sleep. FML

#21049132
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41874) - you deserved it (3875)

On 02/03/2014 at 8:29am - health - by Sleepless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I invited my best friend to sleep on my couch while he looks for a new place. He walked inside, dropped his stuff on the floor and asked me my policy on hookers. I laughed it off as a joke. Half an hour later my doorbell rang. He took my laughter as a yes. FML

#21047796
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41447) - you deserved it (6373)

On 02/02/2014 at 1:33am - misc - by tsukinoie - United States

Today, someone hit my parked car. The impact caused the front of the car to go up onto the sidewalk, and I got a ticket for parking there. FML

#21046882
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47381) - you deserved it (3607)

On 02/01/2014 at 2:47am - misc - by ccgundum (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

#21046118
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58987) - you deserved it (11445)

On 01/31/2014 at 10:29am - intimacy - by wtfjusthappened - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49862) - you deserved it (6246)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: