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mynameis1339

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mynameis1339

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 22 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 387
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mynameis1339 : FML is a good way to kill some time

mynameis1339's page activity

Visits<b>pimp_named_mitch</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 2:46am<b>MemeVillage</b> - the 12/21/2012 at 6:16am<b>Mrman10</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 3:06pm<b>eata</b> - the 08/18/2011 at 9:38pm

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mynameis1339's favorite FMLs

Today, I spilled hot coffee all over this man at work. I tried apologizing and saying it was an accident, but he then complained, which resulted in me being unemployed. The man I spilled coffee on was my uncle. FML

#17834355
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29283) - you deserved it (2600)

On 09/25/2011 at 9:57pm - work - by Chan - United States (Virginia)

Today, I bought a lanyard for my new car keys. "Epic Fail" was printed on it. Not two hours after getting it and putting my keys on it, I locked them in my car. I don't have a spare. FML

#17826214
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10132) - you deserved it (29803)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51912) - you deserved it (2605)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was working when I delivered the standard "Hello, how are you?" to a customer. He took the opportunity to tell me about his deceased wife, his estranged children, and his anal tearing. After a while, I tried to help someone else, and he complained to my manager. I was written up. FML

#17754607
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25947) - you deserved it (3148)

On 09/15/2011 at 10:38pm - work - by MrTandy - United States (New York)

Today, I was working when I delivered the standard "Hello, how are you?" to a customer. He took the opportunity to tell me about his deceased wife, his estranged children, and his anal tearing. After a while, I tried to help someone else, and he complained to my manager. I was written up. FML

#17754607
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25947) - you deserved it (3148)

On 09/15/2011 at 10:38pm - work - by MrTandy - United States (New York)

Today, after months of looking forward to my new fencing lessons and speculating endlessly about the people who might be in my class, I went to my first lesson. I was the only one who showed up. FML

#17739609
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20717) - you deserved it (2940)

On 09/13/2011 at 9:30pm - misc - by ManinBlack (man) - Canada

Today, I got bored and decided to visit a porn site. I typed in the address and hit enter. A split second later, I realized I wasn't typing into the browser address bar, but in a chat window on my other screen. I'd been chatting with a girl I wanted to get with at the time. FML

#17719852
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13138) - you deserved it (59134)

On 09/11/2011 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by Extended_desktop (man) - Poland

Today, I found out that the man who offered to put up the woman I love in exchange for me helping out with his rent, has in fact been her "other" boyfriend since before she moved in. FML

#17706301
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21519) - you deserved it (3820)

On 09/09/2011 at 7:48pm - love - by Just me (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, as I was making instant hot chocolate from the hot water dispenser in the break-room at work, a coworker informed me that it was industrial "recycled" wastewater that was only supposed to be used for washing tools. Thanks. I've only been doing that every day for the past 8 months. FML

#17623287
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25742) - you deserved it (4543)

On 08/30/2011 at 6:38pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML

Today, my husband bought me a cinnamon roll because my blood sugar was dangerously low. My first bite was easily the most delicious thing I'd eaten since getting pregnant. As I sat in frosting coated ecstasy, my husband snatched up the rest of the pastry and finished it himself. FML

#17511750
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28439) - you deserved it (3995)

On 08/18/2011 at 5:41pm - health - by AmySweet - United States (Washington)

Today, I had a cop pull me over because he claimed that he saw me taking a bunch of colorful pills at the previous stop sign. I was eating skittles. FML

#17502057
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38204) - you deserved it (2796)

On 08/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by candymansvan17 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. I called AAA, and they said it would take 2 hours to get there. They called 2 hours later saying they got a flat tire and would be there in another 2 hours. FML

#17499857
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36786) - you deserved it (2807)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I started my job as an assistant to a beekeeper. I forgot to put gloves on, and got stung like crazy. My hands swelled up to the size of baseball gloves. Turns out, I'm allergic to bees. FML

#17479997
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13835) - you deserved it (32680)

On 08/15/2011 at 11:55am - work - by rr - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my car was broken into, and they stole all my CDs, but left my daughter's Black Eyed Peas CD behind. I'm pretty pissed about the theft, but almost glad to see that the delinquents in my town have a decent taste in music. FML

#17444868
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28888) - you deserved it (3893)

On 08/11/2011 at 10:30pm - money - by Musicfan - United States (Pennsylvania)



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