mylifestoryy

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mylifestoryy

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 March 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1616
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About mylifestoryy : 7 FML's denied? I don't even remember sending any in lol

mylifestoryy's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 12:31pm<b>Maxwellminpin</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 5:36pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 9:11pm<b>facelick</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 11:19am<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 4:35pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 4:42pm<b>polarbearpiss</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 7:54am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:40pm<b>Yulia</b> - the 04/04/2010 at 4:44pm<b>cr1mson_k1ss</b> - the 03/19/2010 at 7:41am<b>mopho</b> - the 02/15/2010 at 12:46am<b>HarperGirl</b> - the 01/11/2010 at 10:35am<b>ha</b> - the 12/18/2009 at 7:25pm<b>SmexxiHunny</b> - the 12/11/2009 at 7:22pm<b>Sun_Kissed18</b> - the 11/21/2009 at 1:23pm<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 09/04/2009 at 4:09pm<b>ScaryStu</b> - the 08/30/2009 at 12:09pm<b>Peroxide</b> - the 08/03/2009 at 6:36am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 6:31pm

mylifestoryy's FML badges

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mylifestoryy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to this guy I like. He's very private and hides all his photos and wall posts on Facebook. Or so I thought, turns out he has me on a restricted friends list, titled "Creepers." FML

by creeper / 12/14/2009 at 12:03am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

by swedishdude / 11/14/2009 at 8:37am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

by Michelle / 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, my friend snuck up on me and yelled, "Gotcha!" I screamed and dropped a gallon of blood-red paint on my new, white kitchen floor. Now it looks like I've murdered someone in my kitchen. FML

by kitchencrime / 08/28/2009 at 2:11am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a concert and the guy who was selling the drinks tripped and fell down the stairs, landing on the floor next to me and the drinks went all over. I went to make sure he was okay and helped pick up the drinks. After assuring me he was okay, he gave me a free soda. It exploded. FML

by blinkme / 08/28/2009 at 1:39am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom told me she was getting tired of that smell of marijuana in the house. So I confess and tell her I will never bring it home again. She was talking about my neighbors. FML

by Dumbweed / 08/28/2009 at 12:42am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I swerved to avoid hitting a dog that ran in front of my car. The dog was fine but I hit a road sign, ripped off my rearview mirror, and cracked my passenger side window. When I got out to examine the damage to my car, the dog growled at me. FML

by animalover / 08/13/2009 at 12:49pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up with a hangover after an intense night out. I decided to look at my camera to figure out what happened the night before. All my pictures were deleted except one video of me dancing to Lollipop by Lil Wayne, and giving a lapdance and head to my giant plush rat. FML

by crunkdrunk / 05/31/2009 at 1:48am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML

by waterproblem / 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

by AyoitsSteveo / 05/24/2009 at 5:49am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, was my wedding night. We had decided to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressed and smiled at my new wife, she burst into tears and cried, "please don't make me do this." FML

by honeymoondisaster / 05/23/2009 at 12:44am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because "She wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML

by bopbop / 05/19/2009 at 9:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I was coaching a little league soccer game. I was telling one of my players to go cover another kid. I said "go cover the little yellow kid!" because he happened to be wearing a yellow shirt. He also happened to be Asian. I then got death stares from his family members. FML

by Anonymous / 05/17/2009 at 9:48am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

by Flicker / 05/14/2009 at 3:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous