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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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mycleverusername

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mycleverusername
  • Town/Country : Boone, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 August 1991 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 326
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mycleverusername's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a smoke break at work and I noticed a huge zit on my face. I used the reflection from a window to take care of the problem and then realized that there was a staff meeting taking place on the other side. FML

#5947832 (72)

I agree, your life sucks (6857) - you deserved it (23556)

On 10/22/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by JC (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my dad that for Halloween I'm going to be an '80s workout Barbie. He just looks at me and says, "Yeah as the 'before' picture". FML

#5944823 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (20627) - you deserved it (5408)

On 10/22/2009 at 2:47pm - misc - by freshman15 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

#5910203 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (34889) - you deserved it (4198)

On 10/20/2009 at 6:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend because he has anger issues. Tonight, my tires were slashed. FML

#5895031 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (31639) - you deserved it (4638)

On 10/19/2009 at 11:54am - love - by kierstin (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, when I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 years, she said no because she thought we were moving too fast. FML

#5892074 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (38104) - you deserved it (1974)

On 10/19/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Indonesia (Jawa Timur)

Today, I spilled a half bottle of superglue on my hands. I also found out that cold water only makes it harden faster. FML

#5878070 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (20665) - you deserved it (9818)

On 10/18/2009 at 12:38pm - misc - by Xia (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML

#5865096 (86)

I agree, your life sucks (6056) - you deserved it (27659)

On 10/17/2009 at 12:25pm - love - by Ohgreat (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I showed my boyfriend the new tattoo of a butterfly that I'd gotten on my lower back. He said, "It looks like it's flying when your rolls jiggle." FML

#5688481 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (9377) - you deserved it (26279)

On 10/06/2009 at 7:32pm - misc - by lovebigmacs (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as 'some weirdo had walked into her house.' I am that weirdo, she wasn't joking. FML

#5600250 (53)

I agree, your life sucks (24317) - you deserved it (1495)

On 10/02/2009 at 3:46am - misc - by forgotten (man) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, I was in line at a checkout. I have quite a few facial piercings and 1/2" gauges in my ears. The very heavy cashier asks how big my gauges are and then starts telling me about how she recently got her clitoris pierced and how sometimes she has orgasms behind the register. FML

#3176969 (366)

I agree, your life sucks (56020) - you deserved it (8233)

On 06/24/2009 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by toomuchmetal (woman) - United States (Virginia)