Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 November 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1305
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About mwmessedupl : My life is probably the most fucked up thing possible, I'm diagnosed with epilepsy, food allergies to corn and rice, & I have a very unknown disease called EIA, where i basically get anaphylaxis if i do strenuous excercise.

Okay so i was over at my aunts house during my parents second honey moon, and i promised my six year old cousin i would play hide seek with her so we did i rushed to find a hiding spot in my older cousins bedroom daron (he wasnt home at the time so i hid underneath his bed. Then before I know it i have size 18 feet in my face, he decides to go to bed after work!, and nicole got bored and stopped looking for me so i was stuck under his feet all night. Since i slept in there on his couch no one noticed i was gone

If you wanna tell me your opinion on it email me at:,
I check it like twice a week so don't think you'll get a quick response

mwmessedupl's page activity

Visits<b>nataly23</b> - the 04/18/2013 at 1:55pm<b>danielle523</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 8:17pm<b>dontgiveafuck1</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 6:29pm<b>Landskrona</b> - the 04/27/2009 at 5:27pm<b>eliz3</b> - the 04/25/2009 at 8:32am<b>not_ur_mexican</b> - the 04/24/2009 at 11:03pm<b>kk</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 4:32am<b>jessxoxo28</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 10:07pm<b>maddog</b> - the 04/22/2009 at 11:31am<b>purplequeen</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 3:48pm<b>lizwriteslove</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 2:52pm<b>Go_Home</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 12:07pm<b>broken_lungs</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 10:55am<b>Chaith</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 9:29pm<b>jokerssmile</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 8:27pm<b>rukusrazor</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 9:44am<b>Ineffableturtle</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 3:37am<b>kellster</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 2:27am

mwmessedupl's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mwmessedupl's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in the supermarket and I see this little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I go over to him and ask if his mom knows where he is. The boy turns around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31370) - you deserved it (55441)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by jules (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I forgot to take my wallet off the roof of my car and drove away, onto the highway. A man behind me began flashing his lights and waving his arms. I thought he was freaking out because I cut him off. I flipped him off. He was trying to tell me that all my money was flying down the road. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9140) - you deserved it (82206)

On 04/17/2009 at 2:12am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML


I agree, your life sucks (84755) - you deserved it (6724)

On 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by Kelavmeister (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML


I agree, your life sucks (65400) - you deserved it (7365)

On 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm - work - by brad3720 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had hooked up with this girl and had finally lulled her asleep. I didn't want to stay so I quietly managed to get my clothes back on and get out the door without waking her. I made it all the way out of her building and to my car before I realized I had forgotten my keys. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15570) - you deserved it (109582)

On 04/11/2009 at 3:38am - intimacy - by Smooth (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, one of our regular customers came in and was telling me he bought an assault rifle. I told him not to go off his meds and shoot up the store, as a joke. Later, my manager told me that the guy is on antidepressants and was discharged from the military for being "mentally unfit." FML


I agree, your life sucks (44824) - you deserved it (18747)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:07am - health - by masterdisaster (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was going through my old MSN conversations. I then realized that when I first got MSN, I didn't know that messages you sent after people went offline would be delivered to them when they signed in. I used to type 'I love you' to my crush after every time he went offline. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34558) - you deserved it (89198)

On 03/28/2009 at 6:13pm - love - by WeezysBaby (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: