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musichunter13

Offline (the 12/24/2013 at 5:03pm) | Search for a member

musichunter13

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  • Number of visits : 366
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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musichunter13's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my dad's house for Christmas. Soon enough, my grandma had commented on how much weight I've gained, my aunt asked me why I'm still single, and my dad joined in by reminding me that I still haven't been accepted into college. Only three more days to go. FML

#21004056
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35257) - you deserved it (3216)

On 12/24/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by holiday from hell - United States (New York)

Today, I pretended to cry in front of my cat because she doesn't cuddle with me anymore. Yeah, I tried to guilt-trip my cat into loving me. FML

#21003528
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40093) - you deserved it (10499)

On 12/24/2013 at 11:53am - animals - by PityKitty (woman) -

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

#21003362
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38405) - you deserved it (5277)

On 12/24/2013 at 5:45am - misc - by yarenis - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

#21001267
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50152) - you deserved it (6940)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by bleach bleach bleach (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, it was safe to say I started sleepwalking again, after I woke up with a mouth filled with soil and a ravaged plant. FML

#20995711
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36609) - you deserved it (3226)

On 12/17/2013 at 10:38am - health - by adventurousnightsbutnotinagoodway (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, at my job as a night janitor, at which I work alone, I saw an old man enter a bathroom. When I went to investigate, it was completely empty. I'm now scared to work. FML

#20987406
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53710) - you deserved it (3383)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:50am - work - by scared shitless (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend bought a onesie. He sleeps in it, goes out in it and won't take it off, not even for sex. FML

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she loves the most about me. She said it's the fact that I look like her cousin. FML

#20984907
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45170) - you deserved it (3702)

On 12/08/2013 at 11:49am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend when all of a sudden he stops, grabs my breasts with both hands, makes circular motions with them, and yells, "Daniel-san! Wax on! Wax off! Wax on! Wax off!", killing my orgasm dead. FML

#20981063
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45012) - you deserved it (5577)

On 12/04/2013 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by KarateKid76 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got nominated to sit in a chair in the middle of the gym during a high school rally while the entire school got to throw paper balls at me. FML

#20979287
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41208) - you deserved it (4220)

On 12/03/2013 at 11:34am - misc - by reallyhighschool (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my bandmate and I decided to propose to our girlfriends, who are also in the band, at the same time in the middle of a concert. His girlfriend said yes. Mine ran off the stage crying. FML

#20978799
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49671) - you deserved it (5762)

On 12/02/2013 at 10:42pm - love - by rock'n roller (man) -

Today, I called the police to report that my car had been keyed. I remember going to a bar last night and getting drunk. A surveillance camera revealed that after my drunken self couldn't unlock the door to my car, I punched the door and hurt my fist so bad that I keyed my own car. FML

#20977883
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18655) - you deserved it (49086)

On 12/02/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by car keyer (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I reduced my psychologist to tears. FML

#20976567
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42024) - you deserved it (3926)

On 12/01/2013 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments

Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML

#20974953
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25066) - you deserved it (37492)

On 11/29/2013 at 4:49pm - love - by holy sleet (man) - United States (New York)



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