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mtrevino122

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mtrevino122

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  • Number of visits : 160
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mtrevino122's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML

#21271187
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34311) - you deserved it (3424)

On 10/05/2014 at 12:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

#21270711
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39453) - you deserved it (8360)

On 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by SadMother - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while working as a teacher at a daycare, a two year-old girl decided the best way to share that she had pooped was to reach in her diaper and attempt to hand some to me. FML

#21264874
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30167) - you deserved it (2768)

On 09/25/2014 at 12:03am - kids - by disgusted - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

Today, I was hit with a sudden onset of diarrhea and had to use the washroom on the train. As soon as I pulled down my pants, my worst nightmare came true, as someone opened the door and exposed me to the other passengers. FML

Today, I found my husband in the bathtub, which was filled with blood-red water, motionless and staring blankly at the ceiling. I started screaming and crying, and he burst into laughter at his "hilarious" prank. He only seemed regretful that his video camera hadn't been recording properly. FML

#21261267
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36766) - you deserved it (3450)

On 09/19/2014 at 1:58pm - misc - by TuT (woman) - France

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

#21251846
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41168) - you deserved it (8208)

On 09/04/2014 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by candy man - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46824) - you deserved it (3796)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

#21248283
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46544) - you deserved it (4675)

On 08/30/2014 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, a guy in my class was talking about himself. He started his story with, "When I was little, I was a ginger." I replied without thinking, "Is that why you got put up for adoption?" Him being adopted was the actual story he wanted to tell. FML

#21246134
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20035) - you deserved it (17)

On 08/26/2014 at 11:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, it's my fourth day of my trip to the USA. I've actually started keeping count of the number of times people get confused because I was born in South Africa and yet am not black. Current count: 9. FML

#21245756
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41097) - you deserved it (3504)

On 08/26/2014 at 12:22pm - misc - by WTF, guys? - United States (California)

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39939) - you deserved it (7257)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

#21244527
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33479) - you deserved it (3693)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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