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mrda

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mrda

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1997
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mrda's page activity

Visits<b>Elgaard</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 3:48am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 11:57pm<b>MONTOYA412</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 12:36am<b>chriisteex</b> - the 10/18/2009 at 9:23pm<b>screwthat</b> - the 10/17/2009 at 11:37am<b>prplr</b> - the 09/12/2009 at 2:23pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/12/2009 at 12:58pm<b>HEARtBREAkKIDDxl</b> - the 08/29/2009 at 10:15pm

mrda's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mrda's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I watched Juno. When the baby is born in the film, I put my arm around my girlfriend and whispered in her ear that one day it could be us having a baby. She responded by punching me in the happy sacks and telling me I wasn't getting any from her in a long time. FML

#5931603
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9876) - you deserved it (27088)

On 10/21/2009 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by Ouch (man) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)

Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?". I said "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?". She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML

#5929779
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10061) - you deserved it (31971)

On 10/21/2009 at 3:53pm - love - by fyourlife (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87531) - you deserved it (14635)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML

#5820033
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8272) - you deserved it (39508)

On 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I learned that the excessive groin sweating I've been trying to deal with for weeks isn't groin sweating. It's a slow and steady stream of urine that I have no control over. FML

#5743316
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46975) - you deserved it (3236)

On 10/09/2009 at 5:25pm - health - by lizzzie (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

#5724132
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41919) - you deserved it (3023)

On 10/08/2009 at 5:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, on my break, I decided to be friendly and chat with a co-worker that everyone else always seems to avoid. He spent the next ten minutes telling me all about his abcessing sebaceous cysts. Apparently, "The scars look just like gunshot wounds." FML

#5707882
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25846) - you deserved it (5119)

On 10/07/2009 at 6:36pm - work - by loverofstrife (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at a music festival when a group of idiots decided to push over a port-a-loo (portable toilet). I rushed over and tried to hold it up to save the person inside from a very messy and embarrasing scene. Not only did the door open, covering me in excrement, but there was no-one inside. FML

#5681273
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36752) - you deserved it (8575)

On 10/06/2009 at 11:56am - misc - by good-samaritan-fail (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I fainted on the sidewalk. When I woke up, I was still lying on the sidewalk, people were stepping over me and my purse was gone. FML

#5676795
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56713) - you deserved it (3307)

On 10/06/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by blackedout (woman) - Singapore

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

#5663418
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47666) - you deserved it (3868)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to drink the most vile and disgusting medicinal treatments I could ever imagine. Then I had to drink it again when I threw up the first batch. FML

Today, my (now former) best friend kicked me out of the band I started because I wasn't 'dedicated enough' after a 3 day 'holiday' to visit my dying uncle. He also during this 3 day 'holiday' convinced my girl friend to leave me and date him. FML

#5287985
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53325) - you deserved it (2974)

On 09/16/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by dj163 (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer I saw her battery was flat so I said "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said "Not yet." FML

#5144800
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13333) - you deserved it (48680)

On 09/09/2009 at 5:58am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed with myself for lasting through multiple songs. Then I realized her ipod was playing a medley. I only lasted 3 1/2 minutes. FML

#4954327
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20225) - you deserved it (9351)

On 08/31/2009 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by sadinthesack (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I swapped seats with someone on a ferry so she could sit next to her friend. Minutes later, a child sitting behind me threw up on my head, while the girl I had swapped with and her friend laughed hysterically as I attempted to wipe the puke from my hair. FML

#4900941
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45732) - you deserved it (3447)

On 08/29/2009 at 4:48am - kids - by littlemisstiny (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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