Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mr_plow

Search for a member

mr_plow

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 114
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

mr_plow's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of mr_plow's badges

mr_plow's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

#18129545
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14519) - you deserved it (33843)

On 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm - animals - by benji - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML

#18129165
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22761) - you deserved it (21211)

On 11/01/2011 at 1:52pm - misc - by bakedplum (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my friend took me and a bunch of other guys out to a nice dinner. This was his way to say thank you for helping him move to a new apartment. He got the cheque, excused himself to go to the restroom and never came back to pay. FML

#18128674
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27828) - you deserved it (2472)

On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - money - by moodyreallyrocks - United States (Kentucky)

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

#18128656
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46968) - you deserved it (5371)

On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML

#18128181
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8406) - you deserved it (34702)

On 11/01/2011 at 10:52am - health - by pain - United States

Today, I drove past a fragrant steakhouse and my mouth began to water and my stomach started rumbling, which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan and an animal lover. My confused body craves burning flesh. FML

#18127858
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11929) - you deserved it (55851)

On 11/01/2011 at 9:22am - health - by loves the smell of burning flesh - United States (California)

Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML

#18127186
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12099) - you deserved it (41389)

On 11/01/2011 at 5:09am - misc - by candice - Reserved

Today, my best friend threw my football over a wall, so we hopped over to go and get it. Next thing we know, we're both surrounded by men pointing guns in our faces. FML

#18127169
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32500) - you deserved it (6502)

On 11/01/2011 at 5:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my immature step-father rubbed my head destroying the $300 hairdo that took two and a half hours to finish. Three minutes before my wedding ceremony. FML

#18127002
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55707) - you deserved it (5946)

On 11/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by Halle - United States (California)

Today, I'm very ill. My throat and glands are so swollen that whenever I fall asleep, I relax too much and cut off my own air. The doctor said it's a viral infection and there's nothing they can give me, so I can choose between trying to kill myself by sleeping or staying awake for the next few days. FML

#18126766
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33029) - you deserved it (2230)

On 11/01/2011 at 2:29am - health - by DirtyCharmed - United States (Washington)

Today, I was the 19th wheel at a party. Yes, I counted. FML

#18126270
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32190) - you deserved it (4310)

On 11/01/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Tom - United States

Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML

#18123545
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28909) - you deserved it (3020)

On 10/31/2011 at 8:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, it's my first Halloween in America since moving from Russia. While handing candy to children, my roommate told me to compliment a little girl by saying "You have a face only a parent could love". I found out it isn't a compliment when I was punched by her Dad. FML

#18123413
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35879) - you deserved it (5009)

On 10/31/2011 at 8:18pm - kids - by VladyBoi (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was almost out of conditioner, despite having just bought some. Apparently, my boyfriend has been using it to condition his pubes. He thinks doing this will make me want to give him more blowjobs. FML

#18123104
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29099) - you deserved it (4878)

On 10/31/2011 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by silkysmooth (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32615) - you deserved it (3229)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: