mr_plow

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mr_plow

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 625
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mr_plow's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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mr_plow's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

by jjs51 / 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I learned that when microwaveable pizzas say "Caution, hot after cooking" what they really mean is that you should be prepared for the cardboard tray to fall apart when you try to pick it up and that boiling hot cheese is going to run down your arm. FML

by ohforcheese / 01/19/2012 at 3:19pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Health

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

by Crashburn / 01/16/2012 at 6:09am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Love

Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML

by joeshmoe / 01/15/2012 at 7:52am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to the one side effect: "unusual vaginal secretions". They're unusual alright, they glued my underwear to my skin. FML

by involuntary waxing / 01/15/2012 at 4:00am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

by haggisbowl / 01/14/2012 at 1:52am / United States / Intimacy

Today, the first snow of the season fell. My husband celebrated by pelting me with snowballs, while I was on the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2011 at 2:08pm / United States / Love

Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML

by John / 11/19/2011 at 12:50pm / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my boyfriend the silent treatment. He put his Facebook status as "When your girlfriend finally shuts up for once". FML

by kaybax / 11/19/2011 at 6:42am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Love

Today, I found out that my boyfriend's "therapy" meetings have been with my best friend, in his truck. FML

by Aleial / 11/19/2011 at 3:20am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

by Tyler / 11/19/2011 at 3:05am / United States / Intimacy

Today, we had a sprint race in gym class which I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML

by dan / 11/18/2011 at 11:54pm / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, MS Word kept crashing with a memory error, so I called tech support. Instead of actually fixing the problem, their tech wasted over an hour of my time defragmenting the hard drive, disabling the anti-virus, and downloading new video card drivers from some shady site, before giving up. FML

by I quit / 11/18/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading". FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2011 at 6:36pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I received a fine for leaving my car at the airport. Each day it's been there, they added an additional $50. My car was stolen two weeks ago. FML