About mowmowlife : I'm just your regular old Philosoraptor questioning what kids are for, since they clearly aren't for tracks
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
You sure know how to party?
You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!
I NEED to know!
You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15328) - you deserved it (7218)
On 11/14/2011 at 11:51pm - animals - by MY CAR (man) - United States (California)
Today, it was my first time taking blood on the ward. The doctor saw that I was nervous and gave me a violent old man with schizophrenia who thought I was there to kill him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20730) - you deserved it (1781)
On 11/04/2011 at 7:59am - health - by sakura_girl (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I went to run outside, only to smack straight into our sliding glass door. Just a few hours beforehand, my mom put up a strip of colored tape to stop this from happening. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6881) - you deserved it (22783)
On 09/22/2011 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23915) - you deserved it (2868)
On 09/04/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by ironic driver - United States (Texas)
Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29366) - you deserved it (3955)
On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, I noticed a young child wandering out onto a busy street. I managed to grab his arm just as he stepped off the sidewalk and yank him away from almost certain death. My reward was his mother, who was on her cell phone the whole time, screaming at me for touching her child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26546) - you deserved it (1504)
On 08/31/2011 at 1:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
I agree, your life sucks (22158) - you deserved it (1732)
On 08/20/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by anonymous22kittylicklick (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30590) - you deserved it (3229)
On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30632) - you deserved it (2760)
On 07/30/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Tootie (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12156) - you deserved it (31194)
On 07/20/2011 at 8:36am - misc - by ElixirRose - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24706) - you deserved it (4862)
On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)
Today, I went to the carnival with a guy I like. When we went on the big scary ride where you flip upside down a lot, he asked me to be his girlfriend. Then, I threw up on him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31716) - you deserved it (3134)
On 07/02/2011 at 1:33am - love - by Amanda - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I saw my brother on TV after 3 years of no contact. He was being arrested on Cops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37878) - you deserved it (2764)
On 06/11/2011 at 8:54pm - misc - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I ran into one of my teachers from high school. When I told her I just recently graduated college and was starting graduate school in the fall, she said "you don't have to lie, some people just are not cut out for college. There is no shame." I wasn't lying, I graduated with honors too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24845) - you deserved it (1895)
On 02/27/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I accidentally dropped my engagement ring down a sewer. To my surprise, the sewer water was frozen and my ring sat on top. During my efforts to retrieve it, I had to watch as the ice slowly melted due to the warm day. The ring sank further and further until it was completely gone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28208) - you deserved it (4658)
On 01/25/2011 at 1:08pm - misc - by CLH (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 20 May 2013
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