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motherpuncher

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motherpuncher

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 September 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 742
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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motherpuncher's page activity

Visits<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 9:29am<b>bspiper87</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 5:37am

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motherpuncher's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed I give myself pep-talks when I'm lonely. FML

#13010749
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21305) - you deserved it (5371)

On 09/11/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

#10707989
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17489) - you deserved it (25854)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

#10658705
516 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15179) - you deserved it (237690)

On 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by Chichensoup (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me through Skype, with the message "my penis wants more, but my heart and mind don't want to hurt you." FML

#10462251
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34723) - you deserved it (3838)

On 05/11/2010 at 4:56am - intimacy - by justsingle (woman) - Philippines

Today, my shrink diagnosed me as severely depressive, due to a lot of stress and yells at home. After the session, my parents argued about whose fault it was and then went on to yell at me for being depressive and wasting their money. FML

#9647002
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40358) - you deserved it (3441)

On 04/05/2010 at 6:14am - misc - by blah. - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

#9407867
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34423) - you deserved it (5885)

On 03/26/2010 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by Haley. - United States (Arizona)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML

#8706906
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9048) - you deserved it (28418)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML

#8622338
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17626) - you deserved it (5238)

On 02/24/2010 at 7:57pm - work - by Herman - Sent from mobile version

Today, when setting up for a rehearsal, my eldest teacher was standing next to me. My music teacher announces that it will be a tight fit and hard for everyone to fit in the area. The old teacher next to me leans over and whispers, "I'd like to fit in your tight area." FML

#8153537
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27710) - you deserved it (2336)

On 02/12/2010 at 12:13am - intimacy - by pinky (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. Turns out they are firing 35 people. I wasn't on the list until I asked for a raise. FML

#7424503
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27015) - you deserved it (6688)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:41pm - work - by SadMan (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date, destination unknown. I dressed up, he had a tux on. We went to McDonalds. FML

#7275628
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35204) - you deserved it (5147)

On 01/11/2010 at 8:25am - love - by krisx3ftw (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, the instructions on my new IKEA bed made me cry. It includes a picture of a person working alone with a frown crossed out and is replaced by two smiling people working together. I have no one in my life to help me. FML

#7036461
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37217) - you deserved it (4273)

On 12/30/2009 at 2:07pm - love - by hatelife (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

#6937557
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30735) - you deserved it (6920)

On 12/25/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by BathroomMuch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to attach fifteen-pound weights to each foot so I could burn some extra calories while shoveling snow. My dad asked me to move one of the cars in the driveway. When I put my foot on the gas pedal, I couldn't take it off. I ended up hitting my sister and knocking her into a snow bank. FML

#6848786
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8739) - you deserved it (47547)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Klamp18 (man) - United States (New York)



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