morgan020

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morgan020

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 December 1987 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4940
  • Number of comments : 278
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About morgan020 : I live in the country in Texas. I hunt, fish, and go mudding. I have the most awesome kid ever, not that I'm biased or anything though. I drive a Prius. It's actually pretty cool. My husbands jeep is the exact opposite of my car. Huge, loud, and green only if you count the color. My husband is the most awesome man I've ever met. I'm incredibly lucky to have married my high school sweet heart. My son is a well behaved, active, child, that loves to get dirty and be outside. My husband says I have a weird sense of humor but I disagree. But maybe that's why I like FML. :)

morgan020's page activity

Visits<b>_aPerson_</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 8:11pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 2:55pm<b>Misicgal666</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 5:52pm<b>jesswoo</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 9:25pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:37pm<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 11:50pm<b>PhinIt2WinIt</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:42am<b>jsb1426</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:59am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 11:11am<b>tsammii</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 2:42pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:20pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 10:52am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 1:43pm<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 6:27pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 8:19pm<b>xSalashawty</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 4:53pm<b>battlehamster</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 2:28am<b>jubejube239</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 12:37pm

morgan020's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

morgan020's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

by beya / 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I found some .pdf files on my wife's computer. They were forms that had been filled out except for the date and the "reason" section. They were divorce papers. When confronted about it she said, "Well, if you piss me off really bad, I want to write down why before I calm down." FML

by UNmarried / 08/31/2009 at 2:10pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML

by crawfo / 08/31/2009 at 9:54am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML

by Timmah / 08/31/2009 at 1:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, my 16 yr old cousin needed help making a job resume so I give him mine to see as an example. He changed my name to his and it got him a job right away. The sad part? I handed my resume out to about 30 places and I am still unemployed. FML

by Jobless / 08/12/2009 at 9:47pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, was my wedding day. Right before I walked down the aisle in my gorgeous white dress the woman who did my makeup saw a blemish. She went to squirt concealer on her finger and squirted the orange concealer all over my dress. FML

by squirt / 07/05/2009 at 12:48pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

by fd_uplife / 07/05/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I met a great girl at a party. We talked alone, and she made me promise I'd dance with her later. When I saw her later, she was unconscious, and in an ambulance. She'd collapsed, and the entire party assumed I'd spiked her drink. FML

by curiousorange / 07/05/2009 at 11:58am / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, while working as a cashier, I was ringing up an elderly woman's massaging shower head, when she said, "If I had a man like you, I wouldn't need this." She then gave me her number. FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2009 at 8:11am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML

by bridezilla / 07/05/2009 at 12:12am / Canada (Alberta) / Transportation

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

by DutchOven / 07/04/2009 at 5:07pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my dad woke me up by shaking me and saying "If you're not up in two minutes, I'm lighting a firecracker in your room." Thinking he wouldn't possibly set off a firecracker in the house, much less my room, I decided to call his bluff. My room still smells like gunpowder. FML

by Singed / 07/04/2009 at 1:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I checked my voicemail. I was really surprised to hear an adorable message from my boyfriend, who was vacationing in Florida. I was even more surprised to hear him having sex with some other girl for the last seven minutes of the message. FML

by hangup / 07/04/2009 at 11:51am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I got called to a biker bar to break up a fight between my parents. FML

by hot_mess88 / 07/04/2009 at 11:24am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home and found a few of my faux fur coats completely butchered. On my way to interrogate my boys, the only ones home, I found our husky dog, who was recently shaved for an operation, covered in the fur that once belonged to my coat. My boys said 'he was cold'. FML

by Peta2nNoMore / 07/04/2009 at 6:42am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Kids