About mordecaiandrigby : Hi, I'm an opinionated person. Although I'm usually nice, I'm pretty sarcastic. Judging my number of unconfirmed FMLs, apparently my life sucks, but not enough to get an FML confirmed.
mordecaiandrigby's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
mordecaiandrigby's favorite FMLs
Today, I sit here in agonizing pain because of a scoliosis surgery. I have a bunch of painkillers that I need to suppress this incredible back pain. Looks like I can't take any. My mom has hidden them from me because she THINKS I need to be taken off them. I wish my doctor were here. FML
by cantstoplaughing / 10/06/2010 at 12:32am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by kdgirl / 09/20/2010 at 11:02pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by messyfamily / 09/19/2010 at 3:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
by embarrassedhubby / 09/17/2010 at 11:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by soldierboy / 08/29/2010 at 8:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by lee / 08/22/2010 at 3:24am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love
Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML
by captainocd / 08/19/2010 at 3:16pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by divorced / 08/19/2010 at 6:01am / United States (Tennessee) / Love
Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML
by incestastic / 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Chad / 08/14/2010 at 1:37pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML
by Blueberrypicc / 08/12/2010 at 9:01pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by Brandon / 08/10/2010 at 7:19pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML
by Mikey832 / 08/09/2010 at 9:24am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…
- Today, a young woman on the subway asked me to hold her pocket mirror open in front of her. I asked… Today, my wife was talking to our 9 month-old baby. “Your father really is an example.” I smiled,… Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me that he listened to me yesterday: I said that I loved unusual…