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mooseluver4life's favorite FMLs
by Say Cheese / 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
by squishylog / 08/12/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, my three year old sister asked me to go to the amusement park with her. Since I was late for work, I politely refused and said we'd go tomorrow. She punched me in the nuts so hard that I could barely walk. FML
by IRum / 08/11/2011 at 4:45am / Russian Federation / Kids
by MissArizona / 08/08/2011 at 10:12am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm / United States / Kids
Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by Tabby / 08/06/2011 at 4:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids
by nomorecookies / 08/06/2011 at 1:53am / United States (Missouri) / Transportation
Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML
by moonstone15 / 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
Today, I went into a crowded store and tried out a blazer. I was thinking to myself how hot I looked in it when the manager tapped me on the shoulder and politely said, "Excuse me sir, that's a ladies' blazer." FML
by Fred / 08/05/2011 at 1:45am / Japan / Miscellaneous
by SydIsPrettyCool / 08/04/2011 at 1:44am / United States (Michigan) / Animals
by roze198765 / 08/03/2011 at 9:19pm / United States / Animals
by beardedlady / 07/02/2011 at 2:44am / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/02/2011 at 12:46am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 07/01/2011 at 6:02pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…