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moonzombie

Offline (the 02/11/2014 at 12:58pm) | Search for a member

moonzombie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 28 May 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 282
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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moonzombie's page activity

Visits<b>DJ109</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:41am<b>tabarnak</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 4:11pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 7:51pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 6:16pm<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:13am<b>mesutozil11</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 5:27pm<b>xJAGx1505x</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 10:59pm<b>Nick7778</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 2:36pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 11:57am<b>Munchlax11</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 3:58am<b>dragonf1y</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 1:53pm<b>smc3106</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 12:06pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 11:21am<b>BrockALee</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 2:06pm<b>stevothedevo</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 10:17am<b>thatepicguy</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 6:06pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 11:49pm<b>Th3Unkn0wn98</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 11:23pm

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moonzombie's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

#21142020
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41866) - you deserved it (8928)

On 05/16/2014 at 5:07pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I actually uttered the words: "Those are my good sweatpants." FML

#21141634
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37244) - you deserved it (8681)

On 05/16/2014 at 8:16am - misc - by dieana (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML

#21137819
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46547) - you deserved it (6071)

On 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm - misc - by Jarool - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58668) - you deserved it (5030)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML

#21137065
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51648) - you deserved it (7175)

On 05/11/2014 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, I started going on and on about dogs and their different types of breed, behaviours, expectancy, etc. When someone asked me how I know all this stuff, I meant to say, "I fucking love animals", I didn't think it through and said, "I love fucking animals". FML

#21131182
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68) - you deserved it (18018)

On 05/05/2014 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Zekrome - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

#21094789
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30192) - you deserved it (16177)

On 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm - misc - by chocochoco - United States (New York)

Today, I had a music duet in front of a crowd and 3 judges. I play tuba and my partner plays the saxophone. He burst out laughing in the middle of it because one note that I played sounded like a fart. FML

#21082619
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38364) - you deserved it (4195)

On 03/09/2014 at 10:09pm - misc - by some band player - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML

#21075644
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47062) - you deserved it (6663)

On 03/02/2014 at 3:44am - love - by ouch (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

#21074688
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40247) - you deserved it (9322)

On 03/01/2014 at 3:23am - animals - by lacy - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25266) - you deserved it (55434)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42715) - you deserved it (5434)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I woke up with a strange and itchy feeling in my anus. When I told my boyfriend about it, he started laughing. I still don't know what he did. FML

#21068972
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49221) - you deserved it (5829)

On 02/22/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by dontgothere (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I proudly informed my grandma that I now have a girlfriend. My grandpa overheard and said how surprising that was, given how expensive blowup dolls are. He and my grandma then both laughed out loud. FML

#21061712
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43900) - you deserved it (5638)

On 02/15/2014 at 6:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31495) - you deserved it (47586)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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