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moonstruckwolf

Offline (the 09/27/2014 at 2:43am) | Search for a member

moonstruckwolf

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1091
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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moonstruckwolf's page activity

Visits<b>Comet_Candy</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 7:30am<b>Conn3ct</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 11:46am<b>singer0421</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 4:54pm

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moonstruckwolf's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38714) - you deserved it (5544)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41252) - you deserved it (8410) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my store manager told me I was fired. I'm not sure what's more insulting - that he'd fire me, or that he forgot I haven't worked there in four months. FML

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54824) - you deserved it (5681)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my professor ran half a mile in the pouring rain just to return my cell phone, which I had left behind in lecture. Shocked and embarrassed, I exclaimed, "You shouldn't have!" "Damn right," he responded, "I'm 64 years old." FML

#21113974
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38286) - you deserved it (11430)

On 04/15/2014 at 7:18pm - work - by sad but true. - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went out drinking with my tattoo artist brother-in-law. I was so wasted that I agreed to let him try working on me. I woke up with a tattoo of an animated marijuana plant smoking a cigarette. This'll look just great when I'm defending clients in court. FML

#21107817
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24043) - you deserved it (41773)

On 04/08/2014 at 6:04pm - misc - by not a dumbass pothead (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I discovered that the laser disc player I used to have was not in fact a laser disc player but a Pioneer Laseractive. Broken ones sell on eBay for $200 and working ones sell for around $1000. I sold a working one for less than $100-worth of credit at a second-hand store. FML

#21102658
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34196) - you deserved it (16428)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:20am - misc - by Sad Nerd (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had the cops called on me for acting suspiciously. I was using a payphone. FML

#21086220
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40244) - you deserved it (3647)

On 03/14/2014 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I came home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me, saying my sperm were drunk and would raise hell in her uterus. FML

#21055858
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43650) - you deserved it (14244) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm - intimacy - by vegas-81 - France

Today, I visited my girlfriend at her place, one thing lead to another, and we had sex for the first time. Her normally very sweet cat now hisses and savages me if I so much as look at him. FML

#21034982
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42733) - you deserved it (7040)

On 01/21/2014 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by idiot says pussy (man) - United States

Today, I downloaded Grindr to my phone. It also downloaded to my mom's phone, my dad's phone, and my brother's phone. FML

#21030290
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37219) - you deserved it (19911)

On 01/16/2014 at 9:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad and I got royally bitched out by my mother, because she found a bill for a porn site subscription, which was paid by my dad, but made out to my name. I had no idea about any of this, but she now thinks I'm a filthy porn addict and that my dad is an enabler. FML

#21027732
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52461) - you deserved it (5210)

On 01/14/2014 at 3:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my new neighbor asked if I could keep my dog from yapping during the evenings, because it kept him awake last night. I don't have a dog, but I apologized anyway. I didn't have the heart to admit that those are the sounds my girlfriend makes during sex. FML

#21023843
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49012) - you deserved it (7585)

On 01/10/2014 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by lukas (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I lost my virginity. We did it on the floor in my step-sister's room, and the entire time he kept pushing my head into the carpet. I lost my V-card but gained rug burn on my face that looks like a fatal disease. FML

#21016206
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44374) - you deserved it (20113)

On 01/04/2014 at 1:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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