moonski

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moonski

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  • Number of visits : 1017
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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moonski's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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moonski's favorite FMLs

Today, I realised that I've been working in an all-male environment for too long when my supervisor walked into the canteen visibly scratching his balls, and this seemed like a completely normal occurrence. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2012 at 9:25am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work

Today, instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakened by the sound of my dog vomiting all over my bed. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2012 at 7:57am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Animals

Today, I came home to an eviction notice after an apartment inspection. The reason? Having an unauthorized pet that could cause unnecessary damage to my suite. My pet is a goldfish. FML

by goldfish / 03/05/2012 at 9:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, it was my first day being a full-time paramedic. I was shot in the arm. FML

by bad luck? / 01/19/2012 at 12:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I caught three kids setting fire to a bush. After chasing them off, I parked my bike by a house and went to get water. After I'd put the fire out, I walked back to my bike just in time to see the kids running off with it. FML

by Isoldael / 11/07/2011 at 4:38am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, my Dad married his fiancée, who insists I call her "mom". I'm three years older than her, and went to the same high school. She's taking me shopping next week to buy me something "nice". FML

by quickfingers100 / 05/22/2011 at 5:31am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, while working at a restaurant, an elderly lady stuck my tip in my back pocket as I was walking away. I wish I knew this before I'd thrown her to the floor for touching my hiney. FML

by rioght onnn / 05/20/2011 at 3:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my boyfriend was inside a cell phone store talking to a sales guy while I waited outside. I sent him a text, not realizing that the guy was using his phone to call customer service. A topless photo of me shows up on his phone when I text him. The sales guy looked. Twice. FML

by LLCoolBean / 03/03/2011 at 3:32am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my "friend" put itching powder in my cast while I was sleeping. FML

by scratchy / 02/08/2011 at 4:39pm / Health

Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2011 at 7:30pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML

by Oriianna Raiinbow / 10/23/2010 at 2:07am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my girlfriend of a year exclaimed 'Oh my god!' for the first time during sex. Nope, I haven't improved in bed, I recently moved a tv into my room and something exciting happened on the show she was watching. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2010 at 2:32am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

by Chichensoup / 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2010 at 7:44pm / United States (New York) / Health