About moonlight777 : Alyssa
graduate 2012
19!!
amuse me
Socialite
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Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39284) - you deserved it (1936)
On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37887) - you deserved it (7398)
On 03/21/2013 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by ldn (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39458) - you deserved it (4429)
On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, I learned that if not for my grandfather gifting my dad $200, I would have been named Anthrax. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26353) - you deserved it (1610)
On 03/20/2013 at 9:11pm - misc - by cheeseburglar_9000 (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35791) - you deserved it (3480)
On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States
Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33548) - you deserved it (3678)
On 03/20/2013 at 7:07am - intimacy - by Why son, why? (man) - United States
Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26621) - you deserved it (1909)
On 03/19/2013 at 1:00am - work - by seriously! - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I had an interview for a job I really wanted. On my resume, I wrote that I speak conversational Spanish, although I don't. When I arrived for the interview, my interviewer decided to conduct it in Spanish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6140) - you deserved it (64149)
On 03/18/2013 at 7:42pm - work - by nohablaespanol - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out my boyfriend has a chicken nugget fetish. He wants me to take a chicken nugget bath in a bikini. He seems to be dead serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34563) - you deserved it (2576)
On 03/18/2013 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by chickenmcnuggetgirl (woman) - Ireland (Meath)
Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36442) - you deserved it (9425)
On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland
Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me for months. It all started while I was in the hospital, he says, because we were supposed to go out that day, but then I "had to go and get sick". He blames my emergency surgery for his infidelity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31339) - you deserved it (1854)
On 03/17/2013 at 4:12pm - love - by need an appendickectomy (woman) - Finland
Today, I was outside at a café and looked at my phone. When I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31194) - you deserved it (1768)
On 03/17/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, my grandma gave me a sex talk. Not the usual one, either. This one was about blowjobs. I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to learn if they want a well-behaved husband, but that it's an "acquired taste". Gag me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34126) - you deserved it (3098)
On 03/15/2013 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by butnotlikethat (woman) - China (Jiangxi)
Today, due to a flat tire, I only had 20 minutes to complete a 35 minute walk to catch my train. I ended up sprinting up the snow-covered frozen hill in heels, luggage in hand, only to arrive 1 minute in time, and to find out that the train had been cancelled. Next train in 1 hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29836) - you deserved it (2553)
On 03/13/2013 at 10:50am - misc - by KK3137 (woman) - France
Today, I was helping my father-in-law out at a family barbecue. Somehow, the topic turned to grand-children, at which point I confessed that my wife has been having trouble conceiving. His response was to boom: "Sure you've been putting it in the right hole, son?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28339) - you deserved it (3135)
On 03/12/2013 at 6:43pm - kids - by um... maybe (man) - United Kingdom
Monday 20 May 2013
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