Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

monkeyy100

Search for a member

monkeyy100

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 September 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1202
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About monkeyy100 : ♡

monkeyy100's page activity

Visits<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:44pm<b>ThatOneGuy719</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:49pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 7:57pm<b>JoshuaIsHott</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 2:57pm<b>MrABomb</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 5:15am<b>Kirito_Kazuto</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 5:16am<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 5:04pm<b>shiversgee</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 8:21pm<b>DeathScythe24</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 1:54pm<b>_Minato</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 1:13pm<b>Lars93</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 12:19pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 6:21am<b>Adam5858</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 8:05pm<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 9:57am<b>Generallp</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 2:10am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:42am<b>Nish007</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:23am<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:21am

monkeyy100's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of monkeyy100's badges

monkeyy100's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a shower with my boyfriend. While we were washing our hair, he got soap in his eyes and mouth. I was facing him, and since his eyes were closed he didn't realize how close I was. When he spat the soap out, it went straight into my eyes. Neither of us could see. FML

#20994581
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41631) - you deserved it (5820)

On 12/16/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by abc123 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took my cat to the vet's. When the vet took her temperature anally, I couldn't stop laughing. The vet had to ask me to leave the room. FML

Today, I'm severely sunburned and can barely walk properly. My boyfriend keeps telling his friends that it's because of "how hard he gave it to me last night". FML

#20936372
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47451) - you deserved it (7598)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:51am - intimacy - by snowwhite (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML

#20931509
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42767) - you deserved it (4355)

On 10/23/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by monsterdanceman (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41483) - you deserved it (3041)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I jokingly told my friend that I was the kid who stole his brand new glow-in-the-dark markers back in kindergarten. Now he's ignoring my texts and calls and says we're through. So much for our twelve years of friendship. FML

#20918380
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38450) - you deserved it (9442)

On 10/13/2013 at 12:33am - misc - by markerThief (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones got so bad that she freaked out and threw a tantrum, accusing me of always making important decisions for her. All I did was get her some food from Taco Bell as a surprise. FML

#20912485
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52486) - you deserved it (4804)

On 10/08/2013 at 1:57pm - intimacy - by hubby - United States

Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML

#20912171
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50120) - you deserved it (3747)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:55am - kids - by thisguy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was rubbing my leg. He started laughing and said, "Babe, is this your leg, or am I petting Daisy?" Daisy is my dog. I need to shave. FML

#20910814
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24689) - you deserved it (33968)

On 10/07/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by loserllamalick (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML

#20907982
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19785) - you deserved it (45116)

On 10/05/2013 at 2:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

#20906869
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48725) - you deserved it (6719)

On 10/04/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by f.a.t. (woman) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to one of the United States Mints since he enjoys coins. He looked at the money and seriously said, "I have such a hard on". He did. FML

#20905869
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40481) - you deserved it (3573)

On 10/03/2013 at 11:38am - intimacy - by EconM - United States

Today, a friend complimented me on my "smoky eyeshadow". I wasn't wearing eye makeup. She was complimenting the result of my insomnia. FML

#20904600
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37987) - you deserved it (2825)

On 10/02/2013 at 12:22pm - health - by Tired (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML

#20902425
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42866) - you deserved it (3123)

On 09/30/2013 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, my body-building addiction hit a whole new level when I begged my friend to sell me her breast milk. FML



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: