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monkeyy100

Offline (the 11/22/2014 at 11:08pm) | Search for a member

monkeyy100

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 September 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3577
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About monkeyy100 : ♡

monkeyy100's page activity

Visits<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 9:29pm<b>SilkMudah</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 12:38am<b>broncosfan1996</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 12:04am<b>msamake</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 2:14am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 11:45am<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 11:41pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 7:32pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 2:30am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 8:35am<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 11:51pm<b>RMfml33</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 3:22pm<b>IJG2000</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 6:20pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 6:35pm<b>ThatOneGuy719</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 12:17am<b>Bigmommo</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 6:24pm<b>muslimpride</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 5:38pm<b>_Minato</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 8:03pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 3:16pm

Fucked!<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 4:41am<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 12:32am

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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monkeyy100's favorite FMLs

Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food. The manager blamed me, even though I'm bald. FML

#21117573
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44058) - you deserved it (3198)

On 04/19/2014 at 10:39pm - work - by notmine (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41778) - you deserved it (6697)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54683) - you deserved it (4945)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to convince my 3-year-old son that there were monsters in the house just so he would lie in bed and cuddle me. FML

#21112742
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35231) - you deserved it (25668)

On 04/14/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by tinytiny1124 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I watched a drunk guy getting thrown out of a bar, then get tased on the sidewalk outside. He was our designated driver. FML

#21110183
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39032) - you deserved it (5430)

On 04/11/2014 at 9:48am - misc - by brodinn (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while already late for work, a cop pulled me over. When he got to my window, he said, "Oh sorry, I thought I knew you," and sent me on my way. I was relieved, but still got written up for being late to work. My boss didn't believe the story. FML

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

#21097985
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43720) - you deserved it (6532)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm - love - by oops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I wanted to eat my last bowl of sugary cereal before starting my new diet. I fell down the stairs with the full bowl in hand. Message received, universe. FML

#21097759
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38073) - you deserved it (7388)

On 03/27/2014 at 2:10pm - health - by bonbon789 - United States

Today, on my way to Burger King I got into a heated discussion with my wife about our cats. We have 15 rescues, and I've reached my limit. Guess what came running up to my car while waiting in the drive-through. We named him Pickles. FML

#21091449
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45499) - you deserved it (9797)

On 03/20/2014 at 12:31am - animals - by cat whisperer - United States

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

#21087156
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47513) - you deserved it (8845)

On 03/15/2014 at 8:21am - kids - by emergencyroom (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

#21081466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48156) - you deserved it (9593)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

#21068594
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42077) - you deserved it (3946)

On 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

#21068134
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51025) - you deserved it (9319)

On 02/22/2014 at 12:39am - intimacy - by awkward (man) - United States

Today, I was watching TV, when I heard a blood-curdling scream from my boyfriend upstairs. It sounded like he was being murdered with a rusty fork, and I rushed to see what the hell was going on, hitting my shin against the stairs in the process. He'd stubbed his toe. FML

#21064600
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40057) - you deserved it (5405)

On 02/18/2014 at 4:15pm - health - by dating a pussy (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31720) - you deserved it (47916)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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