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monkeyy100

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monkeyy100

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 September 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1255
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About monkeyy100 : ♡

monkeyy100's page activity

Visits<b>Whiplash169</b> - 12 hours ago<b>smalltownman</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 9:39am<b>_Minato</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:41am<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:44pm<b>ThatOneGuy719</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:49pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 7:57pm<b>JoshuaIsHott</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 2:57pm<b>MrABomb</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 5:15am<b>Kirito_Kazuto</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 5:16am<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 5:04pm<b>shiversgee</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 8:21pm<b>DeathScythe24</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 1:54pm<b>Lars93</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 12:19pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 6:21am<b>Adam5858</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 8:05pm<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 9:57am<b>Generallp</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 2:10am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:42am

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monkeyy100's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

#21068594
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41818) - you deserved it (3928)

On 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

#21068134
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49348) - you deserved it (9108)

On 02/22/2014 at 12:39am - intimacy - by awkward (man) - United States

Today, I was watching TV, when I heard a blood-curdling scream from my boyfriend upstairs. It sounded like he was being murdered with a rusty fork, and I rushed to see what the hell was going on, hitting my shin against the stairs in the process. He'd stubbed his toe. FML

#21064600
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38287) - you deserved it (5191)

On 02/18/2014 at 4:15pm - health - by dating a pussy (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31496) - you deserved it (47578)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

#21050614
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37973) - you deserved it (7123)

On 02/04/2014 at 8:03pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML

#21050194
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53726) - you deserved it (6634)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:50am - kids - by LadyDeadpool88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49656) - you deserved it (6231)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML

#21042040
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21151) - you deserved it (55954)

On 01/27/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by :( (man) - Algeria

Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that "old people are allowed to tell the truth". FML

#21028123
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44623) - you deserved it (4342)

On 01/14/2014 at 9:38pm - misc - by Pop - United States (New York)

Today, as I was taking out the trash, I spotted my cute neighbor doing the same. In a rush to get out before he went back inside, I slipped on my iced-over porch. I passed out and woke up with a note on my chest saying, "I unlocked your door but you were too heavy to drag inside". FML

#21027337
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45540) - you deserved it (7090)

On 01/14/2014 at 1:48am - misc - by rholt (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53034) - you deserved it (32296)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML

#21025897
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51458) - you deserved it (6470)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:00pm - health - by foreveralone - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was getting ready for a night out with the girls, and without any hint of trickery, just wanting an honest answer, I asked my boyfriend how I looked in the dress I chose. He immediately dropped to his knees, yelled, "NOOOOOOOOO!" and calmly left the room. FML

#21024776
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37626) - you deserved it (8265)

On 01/11/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by -_-" (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I realised after showering that I didn't have a towel, so I thought I would risk a naked dash to my brother's room to steal one of his. He and his friend were in the room and both agreed that I needed a "trim". FML

#21019082
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48686) - you deserved it (20202)

On 01/06/2014 at 1:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

#20999316
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42536) - you deserved it (2502)

On 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by nopissleft (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



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