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monkeyspark's favorite FMLs
by OhhhNooo / 03/14/2010 at 7:23pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I discovered my mom had sold all of our summer clothes over the winter on eBay because we're short on cash. However, I am allowed to cut off the sleeves of all my long sleeve shirts and the legs off my jeans to stay cool in the summer. Nothing's more attractive than looking trashy, right? FML
by Nicole / 03/13/2010 at 2:16pm / United States (Texas) / Money
Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML
by GuiltByTenuousAssociation / 03/01/2010 at 8:17am / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation
by Anon / 02/27/2010 at 11:07am / United States / Work
by merse / 02/18/2010 at 8:20am / United States (North Carolina) / Love
Today, I had an interview for a college. The college is in Rhode Island. I live on the West coast. When I asked the interviewer if they got to the mainland by boat or by some other form of transportation, he told me Rhode Island is not an island. FML
by Anonymous / 02/16/2010 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I got an alert from Facebook that it was my very popular and attractive classmate's birthday. I decided to be sweet and write "Happy birthday" on her wall, only to notice it wasn't there a few minutes later. I rewrote it again and it disappeared. After three attempts, I took the hint. FML
by pandabear / 02/12/2010 at 2:52pm / United Kingdom (Magherafelt) / Miscellaneous
by SummersEve / 02/11/2010 at 7:47pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a camp my friend invited me to, thinking we'd just be roasting marshmallows all day and hanging out outside. Nope. It was a soul searching, "get closer to Jesus" camp. The first five hours were spent repeatedly praying and singing. I'm not a Christian. FML
by Anonymous / 01/29/2010 at 2:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/24/2010 at 11:12am / United States (Virginia) / Health
by Funnymann / 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a man I don't know came up to me and started screaming about how "all you damn Mexicans were stealing American's jobs" and he stormed off. I'm Native American, and I'm pretty sure we've been here longer. FML
by hardtotell / 01/21/2010 at 7:45pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…