[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

moneypenny

Search for a member

moneypenny
  • Town/Country : Marlborough, Ugoslavia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 April 1985 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 781
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

moneypenny's last visitors

FrecklesXO

moneypenny's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

moneypenny's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (30849) - you deserved it (6136)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (14139) - you deserved it (1491)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a drunk man opened the unlocked door to my house thinking it was his house. He tried to attack me because he thought I was a burglar. FML

#8516806 (169)

I agree, your life sucks (20732) - you deserved it (4813)

On 02/21/2010 at 1:05pm - misc - by jerrid - United States (California)

Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said,"Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML

#8433331 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (18176) - you deserved it (2041)

On 02/19/2010 at 1:32am - misc - by GeneralElement (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was leaving Wal-Mart with my daughter when a man was speeding the wrong way in the parking lot. To avoid getting hit, I pulled over to the side. He thought I was going the wrong way. He got out cursing and screaming and punched a dent in my hood. FML

#8388229 (147)

I agree, your life sucks (17044) - you deserved it (1255)

On 02/17/2010 at 9:46pm - misc - by WTFsalad (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML

#8370926 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (20581) - you deserved it (3441)

On 02/17/2010 at 10:05am - misc - by juwkgo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my grandmother decided to tell me about her past as a prostitute. In full detail. FML

#8365042 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (14317) - you deserved it (1488)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:40am - intimacy - by thatssickkk - United States (California)

Today, my husband told me to hold out my hand. He opened his, and in mine dropped a giant mutant tooth he had pulled a few months ago. FML

#8332517 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (13262) - you deserved it (1517)

On 02/16/2010 at 6:51am - misc - by fmlpgh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, like all days, my cat brought something to my doorstep. Usually it's a slew of dead mice; but today he decided to bring this big, ugly snake. I'm always the only one in my family 'brave' enough to go fetch our cat's gift. It took until lifting it up to realize the snake wasn't dead. FML

#8309732 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (15158) - you deserved it (1623)

On 02/15/2010 at 7:08pm - animals - by Mary (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was bored at work, so I started doodling a big muscly arm on my notepad, including bulging veins. After I returned from lunch, my boss called me into his office. Apparently the mail clerk saw and was offended. I was asked to explain why I was drawing a person's 'private area'. FML

#8300405 (236)

I agree, your life sucks (13169) - you deserved it (4946)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I had my first ice skating lesson. I had to wait 5 years for a rink to open in my town, 2 weeks for my lessons to begin, but only 10 minutes to fall and hit my tailbone so hard that I can't walk. FML

#8300373 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (14090) - you deserved it (2530)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:40pm - health - by skatergrrrl (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, our family went out to a restaurant at night. My cousin and I needed to go to the restroom, so we told everyone before going. Less than three minutes later, we came out to find them gone, along with the cars. They forgot about their own kids. FML

#8286568 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (18365) - you deserved it (1306)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:28am - misc - by Abandoned (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML

#8285725 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (14068) - you deserved it (1921)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by MisterBrown (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML

#8266626 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (16369) - you deserved it (1275)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

#8202300 (228)

I agree, your life sucks (26954) - you deserved it (2204)

On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States