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mommyhutch

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mommyhutch
  • Town/Country : Helendale, USA
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 June 1987 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 181
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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mommyhutch's favorite FMLs

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50135) - you deserved it (2939)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

#20841635
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51646) - you deserved it (4249)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML

#20429501
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35413) - you deserved it (3928)

On 12/29/2012 at 4:32am - misc - by gassy - United States (Washington)

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20136682
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15247) - you deserved it (2226)

On 10/28/2012 at 8:29am - work - by radioinvader (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML

#20136326
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21758) - you deserved it (4664)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by Ceej - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

#19603084
408 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55164) - you deserved it (2954)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27519) - you deserved it (4462)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

#19581290
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35001) - you deserved it (3522)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia

Today, I came home from the minimum-wage job I suffer through to support my now ex-boyfriend's ailing music career. It seems his time management skills suck almost as badly as his music, because I found him in my bedroom, licking whipped cream off my step-sister. FML

#19577163
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27108) - you deserved it (3552)

On 05/05/2012 at 12:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10325) - you deserved it (29891)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML

#19508765
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18092) - you deserved it (3530)

On 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm - health - by JurassicHole (man) - United States

Today, my husband drew a penis on every one of my cigarettes. It's a new pack. FML

#19508691
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7002) - you deserved it (59349)

On 04/21/2012 at 11:15pm - misc - by Jenn P (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that the pool boy has been stealing from me for over a year now. The latest things that he has taken are my laptop, the cash I hide in my closet and my wife. FML

#19092869
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35563) - you deserved it (3633)

On 02/16/2012 at 11:26am - misc - by mypoolisstilldirty (man) - Australia

Today, I had to chase my naked brothers around my house for twenty minutes, trying to get them to take a bath, all while they were chasing my best friend around yelling, "IT'S WIENER TIME!" FML

#19076647
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22289) - you deserved it (2338)

On 02/14/2012 at 5:29pm - kids - by ShylaMarie - Canada



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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