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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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mogwae

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mogwae
  • Town/Country : England
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 31 May 1984 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 9911
  • Number of comments : 76
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mogwae's favorite FMLs

Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML

#4874486 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (37838) - you deserved it (4638)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:41am - kids - by mariokarter (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, at work, I was putting away clothes in the Men's department, when a guy came and started shopping in the aisle in front of me. He kept staring at me non-stop. Getting fed up, I said "What are you staring at?" Turns out he was wearing his sunglasses on the back of his head. FML

#4865635 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (5182) - you deserved it (43347)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:00pm - work - by staringisrude (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

#4679232 (289)

I agree, your life sucks (67477) - you deserved it (5185)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:51am - love - by demk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I missed my flight. Why? My niece thought it would be funny to empty out my suitcase and hide inside. FML

#4226931 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (40287) - you deserved it (2288)

On 08/02/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Korea Republic of (Inch'on-jikhalsi)

Today, my little 7 and 6 year old cousins came visit my family home. I heard the oldest one say that my sister was nice and pretty. Then the youngest replied "Yeah, but the older one has the face of a murderer." FML

#4175407 (88)

I agree, your life sucks (33154) - you deserved it (2300)

On 07/31/2009 at 12:01am - kids - by BadMurderer (woman) - Mexico (Tabasco)

Today, I was straightening my hair when I heard this crunching, sizzling sound. Taking the flat iron away, I realized that I had just fused a spider to my hair with the heat. FML

#2207384 (199)

I agree, your life sucks (49272) - you deserved it (4149)

On 05/23/2009 at 10:03am - animals - by beatricesank (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

#1714855 (244)

I agree, your life sucks (21075) - you deserved it (73918)

On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML

#873760 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (19993) - you deserved it (47185)

On 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm - kids - by nothing (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

#618909 (375)

I agree, your life sucks (138235) - you deserved it (18734)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML

#360907 (113)

I agree, your life sucks (61981) - you deserved it (12295)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733 (538)

I agree, your life sucks (34531) - you deserved it (220476)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML

#250417 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (19556) - you deserved it (72185)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by Ethan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, we were fooling around and I was just about to orgasm when she looks at my clock and says "I have to go LOST is on in 20 minutes." FML

#135625 (160)

I agree, your life sucks (55495) - you deserved it (6805)

On 02/25/2009 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by notmyday (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML

#125499 (268)

I agree, your life sucks (67604) - you deserved it (15913)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:32pm - intimacy - by Menareidiots (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up!". FML

#56665 (529)

I agree, your life sucks (141715) - you deserved it (53041)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)