About moemoney8888 : STOP STALKING ME
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moemoney8888's favorite FMLs
Today, my clumsiness has reached such legendary proportions in my family, that when I visited my grandparents, I found they'd put stickers all over their glass doors, so I wouldn't have "yet another painful accident". FML
by fuck yuo / 09/01/2012 at 4:50pm / Canada (Newfoundland) / Miscellaneous
by Sarah / 08/30/2012 at 8:58am / United States (New York) / Health
by Anonymous / 08/22/2012 at 2:01am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized why it's not a good idea to sleep with your boyfriend when he still lives with his mom. She may walk in, make you get dressed, and demand what you have to say for yourself. Trust me, "Your son is good at sex" is not the right answer. FML
by shelby124 / 08/15/2012 at 12:31pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, the summer camp I work at had its annual scavenger hunt, wherein the counselors hide and the kids look for us. It was my first year there, so some of my colleagues showed me the "best hiding spot." Two hours later, still undiscovered, I realized they just wanted to get rid of me. FML
by nalathelionqueen / 08/10/2012 at 6:44pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the mall, when a guy started screaming at his buddy for sleeping with his sister. It was pretty hilarious, so when he stormed off, I mockingly yelled, "Pussy!" He then whirled around and beat the absolute hell out of his friend. Now I feel like I'm going to reincarnate as a turd. FML
by feelsterrible / 08/09/2012 at 3:51pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by ryanharp2 / 07/27/2012 at 1:05am / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/26/2012 at 12:39pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I continued my habit of saying, "It smells like lung cancer over here" any time I see a smoker. This guy turned out to be an amateur MMA fighter, and I was his "workout" for the day. I guess his lungs are doing fine. FML
by xd3box / 07/25/2012 at 12:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
Today, on my way to work, I noticed a woman on the side of the road waving for help, her car appearing to be broken down. I pulled over, stepped out of my car, went over to her car, lifted the hood, and checked it. When I looked up to tell her what was wrong, she and my car were gone. FML
by Joey / 07/24/2012 at 1:04am / United States (Florida) / Transportation
Today, I checked the app I had used during the night. It's supposed to record you while you sleep if you make any noise, and I had downloaded because my friends say I snore. The only noise it picked up was my parents having sex. FML
by Anonymous / 07/23/2012 at 4:08am / United States (Wyoming) / Intimacy
by Luna / 07/21/2012 at 10:30pm / United States (New York) / Health
by It was the 11 year old / 07/21/2012 at 4:00am / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML
by great / 07/20/2012 at 6:20am / New Zealand (Waikato) / Kids
by News-print Face Kate / 07/18/2012 at 12:37pm / United Kingdom / Work
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…