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mochafrozen

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mochafrozen's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

#17508595
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37725) - you deserved it (3004)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML

#17487537
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28565) - you deserved it (3409)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML

#17487267
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32979) - you deserved it (2847)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:22am - kids - by Gross... (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36830) - you deserved it (3460)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML

#17457057
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39299) - you deserved it (4222)

On 08/13/2011 at 2:37am - love - by bTOhno - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I informed my family of my plans to divorce my wife after catching her cheating on me twice. They bitched me out because I will not be able to survive financially or emotionally without her support. I'm a doctor. She's been unemployed for 2 straight years. FML

#17444027
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37489) - you deserved it (2235)

On 08/11/2011 at 8:46pm - love - by Matt - United States (Ohio)

Today, I informed my parents that my husband and I are separating after much deliberation. We came to this conclusion relatively peacefully. According to my parents, I'm now Satan, and will end up on the streets as a crack whore if we don't change our minds and stay together. FML

#17436937
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26798) - you deserved it (3615)

On 08/11/2011 at 2:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada

Today, I was arguing with a friend over whether or not I'm fat. She kept telling me that I was. Angry, I sat down on the chair beside her. It broke. FML

#17428761
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27254) - you deserved it (20709)

On 08/10/2011 at 12:12pm - misc - by elvisfreak5446 - United States (Illinois)

Today, while walking on the sidewalk, someone hit me with their car. They yelled at me for being in their way. FML

#17426296
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31802) - you deserved it (2956)

On 08/10/2011 at 3:22am - misc - by TheKunitzShow14 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, our AC broke. It's 98 degrees inside the house. My parents will be staying at a 5 star resort until the repairman can come to fix the unit in 6 days. They made me stay home to make sure the plants survive. FML

#17425699
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31598) - you deserved it (2660)

On 08/10/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my mom I wanted to try out for the track team. Her exact words were "good luck, fatty". FML

#17425463
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31434) - you deserved it (6052)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:48am - misc - by thatfatkid - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was dragged to the food store with my mom. While we were shopping, the fire alarm went off. My mom pushed the cart at me, nearly knocking me over, and sprinted for the door. FML

#17424598
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26000) - you deserved it (2235)

On 08/10/2011 at 12:31am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML

#17423512
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29000) - you deserved it (3357)

On 08/09/2011 at 11:00pm - animals - by Nekro_Kat - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML

#17418352
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34825) - you deserved it (5345)

On 08/09/2011 at 1:38pm - misc - by iliketoastalot - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend of 4 years broke up with me. She took everything, including the kidney I gave her a year ago. FML

#17417239
419 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56937) - you deserved it (5704)

On 08/09/2011 at 10:50am - love - by aliixmaee - United States



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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