![[fr]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
This member hasn't filled in the description.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I went into Whole Foods asking if they carried a supplement called Carnosine. The girl assisting me had no idea what it was, but asked, "Is this for weight loss?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (12026) - you deserved it (2411)
On 05/21/2012 at 8:10am - health - by medosin (woman) - Austria
Today, I thought I felt my baby kicking for the first time. After excitedly exclaiming this fact to the few people around me, I involuntarily let out the loudest fart. Not the baby kicking, just gas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5422) - you deserved it (981)
On 05/19/2012 at 7:05am - health - by GothicAngel17 - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7118) - you deserved it (721)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6515) - you deserved it (708)
On 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17514) - you deserved it (1502)
On 05/08/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by laury - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7673) - you deserved it (1822)
On 05/06/2012 at 2:01pm - love - by Bridget (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3300) - you deserved it (10704)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States
Today, the school nurse called me in. She said she knew I was pregnant and she was worried about how it was affecting my grades. I'm not pregnant. Apparently I'm just stupid and fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8694) - you deserved it (1316)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:25am - health - by CharlieOrion (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7075) - you deserved it (2134)
On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States
Today, I sarcastically pointed out a book to my mom, titled "Living Successfully With Screwed Up People." She already has it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4908) - you deserved it (1237)
On 05/03/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by screwedupkid -
Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7186) - you deserved it (2884)
On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)
Today, as a medical student working in a hospital, I asked a patient if he had any questions for me or his physician. His only question: whether or not my breasts are real. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6248) - you deserved it (956)
On 04/14/2012 at 12:08am - work - by falafalo (woman) - United States
Today, while my mom was driving me to work, we drove past a lake with an old wooden dock. She stopped the car, pointed and said, "Some guy fucked me right there. I got a splinter in my butt, though, so we finished in his car." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9035) - you deserved it (709)
On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, a bunch of my friends have been accepted to various colleges while I've been denied to the past 5. To cheer me up, my mom drove me to McDonald's. While we were in the drive-thru, she asked them if they had any job openings. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20057) - you deserved it (3167)
On 03/18/2012 at 3:07am - misc - by pwib - United States (California)
Today, while coming out of Walmart, I dropped a $50 bill. Some kid came running up after me yelling, "Hey mister, you dropped this!" as he ran past me laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7637) - you deserved it (1070)
On 03/17/2012 at 9:04am - money - by dhbeaver - United States (Virginia)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
