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mkayden

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mkayden

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 July 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 493
  • Number of comments : 177
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mkayden : Hello there! My name is Mad, I'm 17 and I have no idea what to tell you about myself. Awkward.. Bye

mkayden's page activity

Visits<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 5:23pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 11:50pm<b>flufee2</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 9:01pm<b>SkylarsTheLimit</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 7:15am<b>livinginabook</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 3:05am<b>JuggaloSimms1441</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 4:46am<b>Rozza17</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 4:20am<b>Kflorsheim</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 2:26am<b>pratikp03</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 1:14am<b>Nate66</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 11:27pm<b>DrRobbie</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 10:45pm<b>rws3</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 10:22pm<b>ChristianH39</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 9:06pm<b>taker73</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 8:39pm<b>pandor</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:41pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:01pm<b>DougK76</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 1:58pm<b>people_annoy_me</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 3:51am

mkayden's FML badges

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

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mkayden's favorite FMLs

Today, in a supermarket, my four-year-old son whispered to me, asking if the checkout lady was able to wash between her fat rolls. She heard. FML

#21268173
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29445) - you deserved it (3599) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/29/2014 at 11:08pm - kids - by super maman - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32414) - you deserved it (3334)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35705) - you deserved it (9303)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40094) - you deserved it (4301)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43414) - you deserved it (5263)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41440) - you deserved it (7832)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32494) - you deserved it (7550)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

Today, while eating cotton candy, a drunk person came up to me and said "HEY! COTTON CANDY!" And bit me. FML

#21249322
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36294) - you deserved it (2690)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, as I got out the shower, my mom walked in to give me a towel, then quickly covered her eyes and said, "Woah, I almost saw your penis. Good things it's ridiculously small." I had friends over, and I'm pretty sure I'll hear about this for at least the next month. FML

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39885) - you deserved it (7250)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, the police knocked on my door, saying that they needed to investigate my house for animal abuse. Apparently the neighbours called, reporting a "screeching bird in pain". I have no bird, but I have been singing quite loudly recently. FML

#21244302
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37722) - you deserved it (5013)

On 08/24/2014 at 8:40am - animals - by abusedparrot - Australia (Queensland)



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