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mkayden

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mkayden

0Fucked!

mkaydenmkayden
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 July 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 803
  • Number of comments : 195
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mkayden : I'm a 17-year old that spends most of the time surfing... the internet. Oh well.

mkayden's page activity

Visits<b>Stillo</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 2:46pm<b>AnthriX95</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 10:26pm<b>RooPeanutButter</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 2:43pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 11:29am<b>klutzyduck1</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 4:21pm<b>hasanjk</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 2:31am<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 6:45am<b>MiguelDavila</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 4:57pm<b>yankfan89</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 1:24pm<b>ItsaBucsLife</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:35am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 8:28am<b>Amiiii</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 7:16am<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 4:20am<b>adamant84</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 3:44pm<b>blade9502</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:41am<b>ksbrdkntr</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 12:01pm<b>KingJinx</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 8:54am<b>itsjustsofunny</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 6:29pm

mkayden's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of mkayden's badges

mkayden's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom paid me a surprise visit me at my university dorm. She ended up rifling through my stuff and started to pull out a box from on top of my wardrobe. Before I could stop her, it slipped and fell. Today's forecast: 100% chance of dildo rain. FML

#21338507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31841) - you deserved it (4525)

On 01/16/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my coworker and I announced that we are spending our holidays together, because we both have kids. My boss announced he is coming with us. FML

#21303728
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29030) - you deserved it (3417)

On 11/22/2014 at 5:16am - work - by Carnage23 (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I spent 20 minutes arguing with the class dipshit, trying to convince her that wifi hot-spots are not in fact saunas powered by wifi. FML

#21302021
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29582) - you deserved it (3601)

On 11/19/2014 at 10:09am - misc - by Donutsarelife - United States

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28792) - you deserved it (3451)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37834) - you deserved it (2659)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving with my grandma and she was going 30 over the speed limit. To slow her down, I said, "Hey look, the police". She slammed on the brakes so hard I hit my head on the dashboard. FML

#21279207
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31600) - you deserved it (15680)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:56pm - misc - by karmaaa - United States (Iowa)

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33109) - you deserved it (4471)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

#21276472
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37673) - you deserved it (4821)

On 10/12/2014 at 8:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to talk dirty to my boyfriend, after he promised not to laugh at me. All seemed well, until I heard laughter. It wasn't him, though; it was his family listening from the other room. FML

#21275034
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38804) - you deserved it (5807)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:33pm - intimacy - by TalkDirtyToMe - New Zealand

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37270) - you deserved it (3910)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41806) - you deserved it (11651)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41420) - you deserved it (4351)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML



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