This member hasn't filled in their description.
mje360's FML badges
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
mje360's favorite FMLs
by nraecher / 03/23/2013 at 12:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML
by forever single, I guess / 03/15/2013 at 6:43pm / United States / Love
Today, my boyfriend found out about my severe phobia of moths. It's so bad that I sometimes pass out. He caught a moth in a jar, and put it on my bedside table. I woke up, saw it, and had a panic attack. He recorded it all and wants to upload it to YouTube. FML
by Anonymous / 03/15/2013 at 2:05pm / United States / Health
by ipaid350dollarsfornothing / 03/15/2013 at 3:09am / Qatar / Miscellaneous
Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML
by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 7:40pm / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Miscellaneous
Today, I'm so broke after paying my bills, that I resorted to eating plain garlic butter from the pizzeria down the street for lunch. The worst part: to get the butter, I stormed in and angrily complained, saying they forgot to give it to me. I never even ordered a pizza. FML
by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 6:03pm / United States (South Carolina) / Money
by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 3:56am / United States / Intimacy
Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML
by Jan / 02/26/2013 at 11:50pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML
by assoutofuandme / 02/14/2013 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML
by mr_loveless / 02/11/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Love
Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML
by theydidsmellitthough / 02/08/2013 at 4:59pm / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML
by missedout / 02/05/2013 at 5:48pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
by Experience / 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I was just taking a wank with my laptop on low battery. Almost finished when my laptop died.… Today, excited that I finally got a place of my own, I invited my boyfriend over for a sexy sleep… Today, I am 11 weeks pregnant and my husband has taken great glee in the fact that his horrible gas…