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mje360

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mje360

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 4 October 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 558
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mje360's favorite FMLs

Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over my ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

#20555878
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55582) - you deserved it (8121)

On 03/23/2013 at 12:43am - intimacy - by nraecher (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

#20555435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36655) - you deserved it (17692)

On 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML

#20545151
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32462) - you deserved it (2895)

On 03/15/2013 at 6:43pm - love - by forever single, I guess (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend found out about my severe phobia of moths. It's so bad that I sometimes pass out. He caught a moth in a jar, and put it on my bedside table. I woke up, saw it, and had a panic attack. He recorded it all and wants to upload it to YouTube. FML

#20544812
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35618) - you deserved it (4789)

On 03/15/2013 at 2:05pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my prom dress finally arrived. My prom was yesterday. FML

#20544424
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49309) - you deserved it (6575)

On 03/15/2013 at 3:09am - misc - by ipaid350dollarsfornothing - Qatar

Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML

#20537344
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27102) - you deserved it (5016)

On 03/09/2013 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I'm so broke after paying my bills, that I resorted to eating plain garlic butter from the pizzeria down the street for lunch. The worst part: to get the butter, I stormed in and angrily complained, saying they forgot to give it to me. I never even ordered a pizza. FML

#20537238
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35871) - you deserved it (8648)

On 03/09/2013 at 6:03pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while having sex with my husband, he went soft. When I asked him what happened he said, "I'm about to fall asleep." He then plopped down on my chest and began to snore. FML

#20536683
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40194) - you deserved it (5353)

On 03/09/2013 at 3:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

#20523889
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27709) - you deserved it (3748)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:50pm - misc - by Jan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML

#20505985
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12434) - you deserved it (52828)

On 02/14/2013 at 2:39am - misc - by assoutofuandme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML

#20501864
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24074) - you deserved it (9608)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19am - love - by mr_loveless (man) - United States

Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML

#20498426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21706) - you deserved it (8434)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:59pm - misc - by theydidsmellitthough (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

#20494713
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22458) - you deserved it (8184)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML

#20494705
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33717) - you deserved it (2789)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:48pm - kids - by missedout (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

#20494543
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35658) - you deserved it (3154)

On 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm - misc - by Experience (man) - United States (Ohio)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

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