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miyaviichan

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miyaviichan
  • Town/Country : KC
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1696
  • Number of comments : 123
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About miyaviichan : I like video games.

I get on FML everyday, at least twice a day.

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miyaviichan's favorite FMLs

Today, I joked to a client that every time I see his name, I start singing the song 'Dr Jones' by Aqua. He looked blankly at me, so I broke into song, 'Dr Jones, Dr Jones, calling Dr Jones... ' He still looked blankly, but now also utterly horrified, as were the rest of the waiting room. FML

#21119159
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26534) - you deserved it (8521)

On 04/21/2014 at 5:26pm - work - by banana_tree - United Kingdom

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60131) - you deserved it (29122)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29685) - you deserved it (45291)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

#21046118
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52617) - you deserved it (9410)

On 01/31/2014 at 10:29am - intimacy - by wtfjusthappened - United States (Washington)

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39858) - you deserved it (3998)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I lost my virginity. We did it on the floor in my step-sister's room, and the entire time he kept pushing my head into the carpet. I lost my V-card but gained rug burn on my face that looks like a fatal disease. FML

#21016206
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41492) - you deserved it (18902)

On 01/04/2014 at 1:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I caught my neighbor picking my flowers out of the planter on my porch. When I said something to her, she ran off and knocked over the planter, smashing it. She is now acting like nothing happened. FML

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

#21010264
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42428) - you deserved it (21686)

On 12/30/2013 at 7:10am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 19-year-old brother subjected me to yet another rant about how the writers of My Little Pony aren't writing the show for people like him any more, the "true fans", otherwise known as pimply-faced adults who don't use deodorant and only shower once a week. FML

#21007374
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34191) - you deserved it (3815)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

#21003362
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36633) - you deserved it (4730)

On 12/24/2013 at 5:45am - misc - by yarenis - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML

#21002747
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20082) - you deserved it (41795)

On 12/23/2013 at 6:11pm - work - by dr immature (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49650) - you deserved it (2360)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a call from the girl I like. I got very excited so I quickly picked up. As it turns out, she was actually prank calling me, pretending to be a "liposuction telemarketer" but forgot to press *67. FML

#20980172
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39404) - you deserved it (2815)

On 12/04/2013 at 3:50am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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