About mister_moops : i'm a laid back kinda guy. you know. no worries.
i never go here anymore. but that's mostly because it's just crybaby.com. the fmls are pathetic now and most of the people who make them are retarded.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was on AIM talking to a really cute guy, whom I've had a crush on for forever, when he asked me to video chat. I got so excited and immediately pressed accept, without thinking. Not until he started screaming and cursing did I realize that I was still using my laptop on the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7273) - you deserved it (51369)
On 12/14/2009 at 6:26pm - love - by toiletgirl (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch". I had to wash his plate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23551) - you deserved it (1192)
On 12/14/2009 at 3:23pm - work - by militarywife2b - Sent from mobile version
Today, I woke up and found that someone had taken a dump on my car. They'd apparently felt bad about it, as they'd then keyed "sorry" into the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33361) - you deserved it (1495)
On 12/06/2009 at 8:24am - misc - by flying_vegan - United Kingdom
Today, I received a $500 fine for an "unruly" dog. I don't have a dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23592) - you deserved it (1574)
On 11/27/2009 at 8:48pm - animals - by bill - United States
Today, I took my daughter to the zoo. I threw a piece of my sandwich towards a very cute chimpanzee. As a thank you, he threw a piece of crap at me, which exploded all over my shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7219) - you deserved it (31722)
On 11/27/2009 at 6:36pm - misc - by Thanks (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, as I woke up early to do my physics homework, I heard my parents talk about how big a disappointment I am for them. They discussed how stupid, immature and how big a burden I was. They knew I was listening. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27821) - you deserved it (3152)
On 11/22/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by Cerezo (man) - Guatemala (Guatemala)
Today, I got diagnosed with stomach ulcers. They are very painful, and I have been throwing up blood. On my latest trip to the toilet, I was heaving and the pain was making me beat the floor with my fist, the toilet lid decided to come crashing down on my head, giving me a minor concussion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25705) - you deserved it (2868)
On 11/21/2009 at 11:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I woke up to find my house TP'd. I also noticed our entire house was devoid of toilet paper. Someone had broken in just to steal our toilet paper and TP our own house with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24143) - you deserved it (1958)
On 11/20/2009 at 6:50pm - misc - by WhyTheEff (man) - United States (California)
Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26592) - you deserved it (4303)
On 11/12/2009 at 2:11am - love - by neuroticallyours (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36607) - you deserved it (5279)
On 10/31/2009 at 3:40pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)
Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6220) - you deserved it (28093)
On 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I got a job at McDonald's because I've been really needing money. After work, I got some food with the Monopoly pieces. I completed the set for $5,000, but I can't claim it because I work for McDonald's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29550) - you deserved it (2755)
On 10/13/2009 at 1:41am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36634) - you deserved it (2337)
On 10/08/2009 at 5:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I got an email from the company that manages my Cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40784) - you deserved it (2979)
On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38377) - you deserved it (2900)
On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon
Monday 20 May 2013
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