missyj0

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missyj0

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 4 December 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2795
  • Number of comments : 177
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About missyj0 : hi, my name is Sam and I like things because of reasons.

missyj0's page activity

Visits<b>Scrambled</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 1:39pm<b>alexishbu</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 8:46pm<b>CX_Ashley</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 1:24pm<b>VonTritonIV</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 7:43am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:08am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 2:07pm<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 6:57am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 1:42am<b>Shrekie</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 6:55am<b>ethanc12</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 3:12pm<b>notzax</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:29am<b>jason202700</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 7:28am<b>happysmile987</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 1:34pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 1:52pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 10:48pm<b>SarcasticRonin</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 12:12am<b>Effulgence</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 9:25pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 3:58pm

missyj0's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of missyj0's badges

missyj0's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML

by Username / 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me about this guy who makes balloon animals with his penis. My boyfriend has spent the last 4 hours trying to make his penis look like a pretzel. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2011 at 10:29am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2011 at 3:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2011 at 3:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, while zooming down the interstate, I had to tell my husband to put his penis away. FML

by Wife / 08/07/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I met my new roommate. She severely struggled with pronouncing my name, and decided that to save time and the effort, she's just going to call me what she thinks my name sounds like: Lube. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2011 at 4:25pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, the guy I've had the biggest crush on came to my house to pick me up for our first date. As we were leaving, my father screams out "Do you still have diarrhea?" I don't have diarrhea. My dad thinks he's so funny. FML

by Anon / 08/04/2011 at 4:30am / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

by creepedout / 07/31/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

by anonymous / 07/28/2011 at 1:39am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

by toni405 / 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

by growlr / 07/20/2011 at 5:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

by knolan / 07/20/2011 at 12:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mom gave me the "birds and the bees" talk, while she was taking a dump. FML

by KidCudi227 / 07/19/2011 at 1:42am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

by Anonymous / 07/18/2011 at 12:26am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous