Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About missmurderx : I'm just a wallflower.
If you enjoy any of the following, we should be friends: Asking Alexandria, We Came As Romans, La Dispute, All Time Low, The Wonder Years, Tigers Jaw, Your Demise, Parkway Drive, Mayday Parade, A Day To Remember, A Rocket To The Moon, Man Overboard, The Acacia Strain, You Me At Six, The Maine, Pierce The Veil, Breathe Carolina, Underoath, MGMT, Kids of 88, Of Mice & Men, Woe, Is Me, Sleeping With Sirens, The Smiths, Bright Eyes.
And remember kids, if someone offers you drugs.. Say thank you, because drugs are expensive.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I went to use the public restroom. As I saw the toilet paper was out, I could see there was some hanging down from the other stall. As I went to grab it, I felt a hand grab mine and a voice ask seductively, "what were you reaching for?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had a picnic on the beach. It was so romantic and perfect. He leant forward to kiss me. Once we had kissed he said, "We haven't even started eating yet", and passed me a mint. FML
Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML
Tuesday 22 July 2014