About missababgaga : Why hello there, it seems as though you read a comment of mine and took interest in the person who said it! Well I'm Kristine, and I am a new born Christian. My new relationship with God is very important to me, and I will continue to work at making it stronger. I also like reading about and commenting on the amusing, sometimes hilarious misfortunes of others, and seeing other's opinions on them. I personally believe that most of FML's are very over exaggerated or just plain fake, but they still entertain me. Lastly, it bothers me when the word "whilst" is used incorrectly... quite a lot actually. So yeah, that's all. Now, have a nice day, and God bless :)
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Consolation prize
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Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25991) - you deserved it (5434)
On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to call AAA for the fifth time in two months. When the driver got out, I instantly recognized him. It was the same guy who helped me out all the previous occasions. When he saw me, he snorted and doubled over laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16056) - you deserved it (4788)
On 02/11/2012 at 1:35pm - misc - by big steve (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24627) - you deserved it (5584)
On 02/10/2012 at 12:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, some guy hit my car and then threatened to sue me for "parking my car in such a way that it was impossible not to hit it." My car was in the driveway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22652) - you deserved it (1351)
On 02/05/2012 at 3:08am - misc - by dreefsa - United States (California)
Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33596) - you deserved it (6845)
On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33596) - you deserved it (6845)
On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11662) - you deserved it (14918)
On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12636) - you deserved it (3130)
Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12636) - you deserved it (3130)
Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23308) - you deserved it (3101)
On 02/01/2012 at 3:19am - intimacy - by crybaby - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I had to sit my 13-year-old son down and explain to him that I'd noticed that his pajamas feel a little "crispy" when I pick them up to do the laundry, and ask if he could start using tissues when having some "alone time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26572) - you deserved it (4994)
On 02/01/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by stainseverywhere (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out how it feels when a refrigerator door unhinges and falls on your toes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21123) - you deserved it (1427)
On 02/01/2012 at 12:06am - health - by kb - United States (Texas)
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23517) - you deserved it (3636)
On 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States
Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16073) - you deserved it (7260)
On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring all's fair in love and war, I bought some laxatives to prank her with. They took a lot longer to work than I thought, and I ended up lying in bed, listening to my wife shitting her guts out in the bathroom for over an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5022) - you deserved it (37277)
On 01/27/2012 at 10:13pm - health - by smith (man) - United Kingdom (York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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