Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

miss_kay07

Online | Search for a member

miss_kay07

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Denver, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 7 July 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2511
  • Number of comments : 121
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About miss_kay07 : Working on getting my shit together...

miss_kay07's page activity

Visits<b>xmrshendersonxx</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 6:45pm<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 11:07pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 3:23pm<b>MatthewK</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 2:20pm<b>Amaury56</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 5:56am<b>VoldooPed</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 1:19am<b>devildog562</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 9:09am<b>Countryboy6</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:04pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:57pm<b>lucaskoolstra</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 10:33pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 10:22pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:16pm<b>Nail9797</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 12:46pm<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 3:56am<b>reillyg11</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:00pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 7:38pm<b>immaloser95</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 4:20pm<b>phaelnb</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:54am

miss_kay07's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of miss_kay07's badges

miss_kay07's favorite FMLs

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

#21165186
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50791) - you deserved it (5843)

On 06/06/2014 at 5:26pm - health - by FMyBrain (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I am so shy and friendless that my mother is literally setting up a play-date with one of her friend's daughters. I'm 25 years old and this is my best chance at making a friend. FML

#21164644
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47036) - you deserved it (8656)

On 06/06/2014 at 2:24am - kids - by playdated - United States (California)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of three years. I worked my ass off planning everything down to a T. It seemed perfect, until I actually proposed, at which point I was rejected and dumped, in front of my family, friends and two coworkers. FML

#21126146
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53609) - you deserved it (5686)

On 04/29/2014 at 10:18am - love - by willstaysingle (man) -

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

#21076106
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56072) - you deserved it (14533)

On 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm - animals - by Anonytard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36641) - you deserved it (12878)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)

Today, my neighbor had a word with me for being "loud in the bedroom" last night. I haven't had any action for two years now, but I was too happy that she thought I'd got lucky to tell her the truth. So what was I really doing last night? Trying to sing like Christina Aguilera. FML

#21063667
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38939) - you deserved it (6762)

On 02/17/2014 at 7:14pm - misc - by I must suck at singing (woman) - United States

Today, I'm stuck in a hotel with my psychotic mom, all because she swore there were "demonic" noises coming from our oven. Yeah, our oven is totally possessed, you idiot. FML

#21061598
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40781) - you deserved it (4655)

On 02/15/2014 at 3:51pm - misc - by fuck my goddamn life (man) - United States

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

#21058991
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50692) - you deserved it (18431)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:20am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, during an important exam, I had a huge panic attack and had to run out of the exam hall. Everyone saw me, and now everywhere I go, people keep pretending to have a panic attack and run away from me. I have to spend two more years with these assholes. FML

Today, my mom made a Facebook status about me: "My daughter is on her rags and won't shut the fuck up #annoyingbitch". FML

#21057121
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51096) - you deserved it (8545)

On 02/11/2014 at 11:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I'm a 34 year old male who just got given the sex talk on my Facebook timeline by my senile mother. 5ML

#21038727
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50824) - you deserved it (5591)

On 01/24/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49389) - you deserved it (5277)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, like every day since my wife was prescribed antibiotics for an infection, I had to hide one of the pills inside her food, because she'd apparently rather fall seriously ill than swallow them like an adult. FML

#21022498
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45118) - you deserved it (4407)

On 01/09/2014 at 2:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I stopped at the gas station to fill up my tank and get some snacks. I paid the cashier, then got back into my car, totally forgetting to pump the $50 worth of fuel I'd just prepaid for. Too bad I didn't realize until my car came to a sputtering stop about a mile down the road. FML

#20999926
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38371) - you deserved it (21702)

On 12/21/2013 at 4:07am - misc - by AbsentMindedGal - United States

Today, my OCD has got so bad that I took over 10 pictures of my house's power outlets before leaving, just so I could view them later to reassure myself that no appliances were plugged in. FML



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: