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misixty's favorite FMLs
Today, my husband and I threw a party with non-alcoholic wine. No one acted wasted, until in the last hour my grandmother started slurring her words and slumping. We thought she was joking, until a doctor at the party confirmed she was having a stroke. FML
by Aggressive / 07/09/2013 at 4:54am / Ireland (Dublin) / Health
Today, my demented asswipe of a lab partner thought it'd be funny to replace the birthday gift I bought for my girlfriend with the large intestine of a recently-dissected dog. My girlfriend nearly fainted when she opened the gift box, and accused me of planning the whole thing. FML
by Anonymous / 06/28/2013 at 1:34pm / Nigeria (Lagos) / Miscellaneous
by sugarysofalof / 06/13/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML
by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
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- Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job."… Today, my new boyfriend and I really wanted to have sex, but he went soft as soon as he entered me.… Today, at a gynecologist's appointment, I was privileged to have 7 co-ed nursing students stare at…