mishkaroni

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mishkaroni

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 January 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2125
  • Number of comments : 122
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

About mishkaroni : Ehhh...

mishkaroni's page activity

Visits<b>player20270</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 8:47pm<b>nick_mcc</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 11:07pm<b>Amo1216</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 6:28pm<b>RandomJam124</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 12:36am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 2:50pm<b>tyrann0sauruslex</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 12:39pm<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 1:49pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 6:17pm<b>theFickleFinger</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 5:01pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 8:22am<b>MissMayLaw001</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 2:43am<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:28am<b>maddyylion</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 3:13am<b>SyntheticSound</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 6:23pm<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 5:33pm<b>CODplayer4lyfe</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 9:46am<b>OkayOkayOkayOk</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 9:22pm<b>justmenooneelse</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 11:44pm

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mishkaroni's favorite FMLs

Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML

by Bee / 06/07/2011 at 8:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML

by zain / 06/04/2011 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I received an email from my potential employers at the zoo, saying that they won't be hiring me. This wouldn't be so bad if they didn't keep sending me the same email every two hours to remind me that I am still unemployed. FML

by ryjacs / 06/03/2011 at 4:22pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2011 at 2:57pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister lost a leg. Immediately after hearing the news, my boyfriend started cracking jokes about getting her a job at IHOP. FML

Today, I was at a movie theater. I heard some obnoxious people talking in front of me. After about 5 minutes, I began throwing popcorn at a group of suspected people. As I was escorted out, I realized that the obnoxious people were in the background of the movie. FML

by escortedout / 10/23/2010 at 7:14pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was singing and playing keyboards with my band on stage at a club. A drunken chick from the crowd tried to climb up onto the stage in her heels, fell, and grabbed the back of my mic stand to catch herself. And busted me in the mouth with my own microphone. Then she requested a song. FML

by northernlass / 09/20/2010 at 12:47am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating lunch with my boyfriend when I started choking. My boyfriend took it as an opportunity to sneak food off my plate. FML

by SMS123 / 06/25/2010 at 3:42pm / United States / Love

Today, I was on an airplane and had to go to the bathroom. The guy next to me was asleep and blocking the aisle. I tapped him on the shoulder, and he responded by punching me in the stomach. FML

by anonymous / 06/18/2010 at 1:25pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was sitting in the break room at work eating lunch when I started to choke. My face turned red and tears began welling up in my eyes. Two of my coworkers were there. They began to argue over who would have to give me the heimlich maneuver rather than helping. FML

by swaiteATC / 07/28/2009 at 12:11am / United States (Mississippi) / Health

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 6:19pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting a 4 year-old with a speech impediment. I asked her, "Do you got your bag?" And she said, "No. I have my bag. Babies say got. I'm a big girl." I am 20 years old and in the honors program in my college. I was corrected by a 4 year-old with a speech impediment. FML

by Nanny / 04/30/2009 at 1:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I was on my way home when I saw a cop hiding behind a Budget truck. I immediately slowed down and prayed that he wouldn't give me a ticket. Then I realized I was walking. FML

by kas / 04/30/2009 at 1:41pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy