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mirandariann

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mirandariann

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  • Number of visits : 140
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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mirandariann's favorite FMLs

Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML

#19423040
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13748) - you deserved it (40466)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:27am - intimacy - by anonomous - United States

Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML

#19319000
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30915) - you deserved it (9701)

On 03/21/2012 at 3:27am - intimacy - by ReallyBro (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML

#19311891
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28987) - you deserved it (6287)

On 03/20/2012 at 1:11am - intimacy - by Jen (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28893) - you deserved it (18082)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28893) - you deserved it (18082)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML

#19253868
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9991) - you deserved it (145293)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

#19249528
593 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23170) - you deserved it (52933)

On 03/10/2012 at 2:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

#19249399
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22203) - you deserved it (18315)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

#19249399
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22203) - you deserved it (18315)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

#19239456
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14388) - you deserved it (49950)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

#19211804
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39734) - you deserved it (27428)

On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17153) - you deserved it (29458)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

#18967800
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55058) - you deserved it (4230)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33085) - you deserved it (4453)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

#15356314
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18181) - you deserved it (82759)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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