mirandaelcraig

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Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 6:18pm)

mirandaelcraig

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 20 July 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3136
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mirandaelcraig's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 5:21pm<b>149967</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 6:01pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 10:59am<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 7:07pm

mirandaelcraig's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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mirandaelcraig's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend, and ended up sitting next to this girl who wouldn't stop sneezing. Grossed out, I asked my boyfriend if we could switch seats. After doing so, the girl immediately stopped sneezing and started flirting with him. FML

by Hana / 03/23/2012 at 3:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2012 at 1:29am / United States / Health

Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

by haggisbowl / 01/14/2012 at 1:52am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I just finished nearly a year of muscle-building in order to impress my crush. Turns out she doesn't date fit guys, because "they're all jerks". FML

by Nowajerk / 12/24/2011 at 8:15pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I found out where a few of my favorite outfits went. My mother had taken them out of my closet, wrapped them, and given them to my cousin as a gift. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2011 at 7:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my drunk sister came in my room at 2 in the morning, sat on the side of my bed, fell off, knocked over my glass of water, which ruined my new phone, then got angry at me for getting angry with her. She then slammed my door, which made all the photo frames smash to the ground. FML

by bethany / 11/03/2011 at 1:36pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks vapor rub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML

by lanikai610 / 10/26/2011 at 2:35pm / United States / Health

Today, I ordered food at McDonald's. I'm on crutches, and a guy offered to carry my tray to the table. He rushed out with my food. FML

by myownperson / 10/25/2011 at 4:17am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister finally broke down and told me that our dad gambled away of all my college savings, and I would have to pay for school the best way I can. They have known for months, and when I asked why nobody told me, the reply was, "You're a college boy, we thought you would figure it out." FML

by FATS DOMINO / 10/20/2011 at 11:39am / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, my nephew spent a long while enthusiastically telling me how amazing his new 3D TV system is. I felt his pain as his face turned white when he remembered that I'm blind in one eye since birth. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 12:15am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML

by cheated / 09/17/2011 at 12:43am / United States (California) / Love

Today, while going around trying to find a job, a manager came up to ask me, "Are you looking to work here?" I nodded happily, hoping this would be the end of my search. She looked me up and down, saw I had a jacket on to hide my tattoos and said, "Sorry, I can't hire heroin addicts." FML

by Protectress / 08/23/2011 at 2:50am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I informed my family of my plans to divorce my wife after catching her cheating on me twice. They bitched me out because I will not be able to survive financially or emotionally without her support. I'm a doctor. She's been unemployed for 2 straight years. FML

by Matt / 08/11/2011 at 8:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2011 at 9:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy