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mirandaelcraig

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mirandaelcraig

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 20 July 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 888
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mirandaelcraig's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 5:21pm<b>149967</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 6:01pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 10:59am<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 7:07pm

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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mirandaelcraig's favorite FMLs

Today, I didn't wear my contacts. Determined to prove to my friends I didn't need them, I read all the signs in sight. I couldn't read a particular one, so I began to walk closer. Suddenly I fell on my face, bruising my cheekbone. The sign said: "Caution: Watch Your Step." FML

#1248987
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11681) - you deserved it (58592)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:36am - misc - by notexactly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of 17 months, the first guy to tell me he loves me, the guy I lost my virginity to, the only guy whose parents I've met, told me we should stop 'hooking up' because it's weird that I was telling everyone we were a couple and it was ruining his chances of finding a girlfriend. FML

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
681 comments

I agree, your life sucks (691570) - you deserved it (55724)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was called by my 9 year old son's teacher. He had handcuffed himself to his desk with handcuffs he found in my room. I was told to please bring in the key and not to leave my kinky toys out where a child could get them. I'm a cop. FML

#726983
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96224) - you deserved it (9123)

On 03/31/2009 at 4:47pm - kids - by poo_shoe123 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was eating with my boyfriend and his family at a high-end restaurant when, suddenly, I screamed, thinking a dog had just bitten my leg. I am terrified of dogs. I kicked my under-the-table assailant as hard as I could. It was my boyfriend's adorable five-year-old sister. FML

#539856
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65345) - you deserved it (31456)

On 03/22/2009 at 9:02pm - kids - by Noca (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. His mom called to him from the next room telling him dinner would be ready soon, he needed to move his car, etc. They had a 5 minute conversation...while he was still inside me. FML

#538708
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59323) - you deserved it (7179)

On 03/22/2009 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by liz1234 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to the jewelry store to sell my wedding ring after a long and painful divorce. The shop owner took one look at it and called the cops because I tried to sell him a diamond ring that had been stolen from him 3 years ago. My ex-husband left the country a week ago. FML

#209556
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69079) - you deserved it (2850)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:42pm - misc - by ringmaster101 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I visited my ex-girlfriend's house. I saw her mother and asked "Hi! Have you recovered from that nasty cold that you had for so long?" She said "I don't have a cold," to which I smiled and said "That's great to hear!" Turns out she had lung-cancer instead. FML

#191131
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39421) - you deserved it (14328)

On 03/02/2009 at 11:09pm - health - by AbsentMindedBoy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of no where and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says "I always knew you were a whore." FML

#185042
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62119) - you deserved it (17075)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:03pm - misc - by Stairway2Heaven - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went on a blind date that my sister had set up. When I arrived at the coffeeshop, I approached a man waiting by the counter, asking if his name was Tim (my date's name). He looked at me and said no and then left with a drink clearly labeled "Tim" in bold letters. FML

#178001
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64991) - you deserved it (3916)

On 03/01/2009 at 11:20pm - love - by oprahahaha (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1142083) - you deserved it (115207)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

#2485
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20051) - you deserved it (1814)

On 01/24/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by ohfantastic - United States (California)

Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML

#527
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31734) - you deserved it (1925)

On 12/16/2008 at 11:10pm - misc - by bloom - Sent from mobile version



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